#I’ve been trying to aswere one of these asks
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bardicbeetle · 1 year ago
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Oh hey Alex & Isaac scene
“Alex… Why are you here?”
The question takes them by surprise. Isaac still isn’t looking up, fingers wrapped so tight around the stake they’re going lighter in places.
“I— because you invited me, because I thought—” Alex stops, the question sitting on the edge of their tongue. They try not to do this, not to strain things without reason but— “—do you not want me here?” Fuck. Their throat feels like it’s closing with those words. They don’t think they want the answer.
“I don’t know what I want.” Barely audible, Isaac looks up from where he’d been kneeling, pushing up so they’re eye to eye again. “I don’t know if what I think I want is, is me, or if it’s just—” In moving his arms while he spoke he seems to become aware of the stake in his hand again, and as he cuts off he sends it flying into a corner of the room.
He doesn’t need to finish the thought.
Alex isn’t stupid.
“You think I’m making this happen.”
Isaac looks like he’s on the verge of tears and his gaze drops back to the floor. “I don’t know.” He whispers, “I don’t know and I don’t know if I care, and I should care, that should scare the hell out of me but it’s not—”
“Look at me.” Alex insists, taking one of his hands. “You remember what it felt like, that first time. You can tell when it happens.”
Brown eyes to grey.
Isaac nods but doesn’t speak.
“Say it.” The unfamiliar feeling of all the air leaving with their words. The momentary burn as their eyes go red, then back.
“Yes. Yes I can fucking feel it.” Isaac shakes his head after, like it needs clearing, pulling his hand back. “I—” he wilts a little, fingers clenching and releasing. “—shit.” He steps back again, leaning into the bar counter for support.
“Does it all feel like that?” Alex asks, only following by a step. Keeping their distance on purpose. “Does… does something about this feel wrong?” It’s a stupid question but it’s not one they can stop.
Isaac laughs, humorless, pained, like it’s bursting undesired from his lungs. “Everything? What about this isn’t wrong—please, tell me.” He stops, Alex can see his nails digging into the countertop. “Can— can you come here? Please?” They don’t hesitate, closing the rest of the distance and letting Isaac wrap his arms around them.
For a long moment there’s nothing but silence.
“When you are here it’s great—Carrie and Tom both adore you—having them train with you has them improving by miles, I—” he stops, takes a breath that makes his whole body shake and Alex holds him tighter. “—when you’re here I can almost believe this is normal. You. Me. I—” Isaac’s hands are shaking, still spasming open and shut. When he speaks again his voice has dropped back to that ragged whisper “—but when you’re not here, before, after, yesterday and tomorrow, you are killing people—and somehow I’ve been treating that like an afterthought, like a necessity, people are dead and I am standing here, with you, and I—” He shakes his head, letting it drop to Alex’s shoulder “—I am terrified of the way I think around you, of what you make me ignore, of what I let myself consider.”
There is a pause.
Alex doesn’t really have words.
“I’m sorry.” Is what comes first.
Another laugh forces its way from between Isaac’s teeth. “Yeah… Yeah me too.”
“This is a mess, isn’t it.”
“We are literally training my friends to kill things like you, so yeah, it’s a bit of a mess.” Isaac replies, and despite the way he says it, the words themselves send a jolt through Alex that makes them step back.
“Are we back to things?” They ask, failing to keep all the venom from their voice.
“I—no, no, that isn’t what I meant—” Alex knows it’s a lie he’s telling himself. He did mean it that way. When he speaks again it sounds half choked. “I’m sorry. I can’t.”
“Do you… want me to go?”
Isaac doesn’t look like he has an aswer. Neither of them really seem to have answers for much of anything right now. But eventually he shakes his head. “No. I really, really don’t. But every second I’m with you feels like an invitation to things that are going to get me killed—or get my friends killed—or—”
He stops so hard that he sways a little and Alex regrets stepping away.
It doesn’t matter. It’s clear.
“Or worse.” Alex finishes for him.
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fanficmemes · 4 years ago
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CB, I sent a longass ask like two days ago, and idk if it sent. If it did and u don't want to answer it, no problem!!!! The app is just notorious for eating messages 💖💖💖 ily my Liege™
Trying to come up w the perfect response bestie but who knows when inspiration will strike 😔
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sonnetthebard · 3 years ago
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if it's not too much to ask, could i request a continuation to the jane/linda switched at birth story? 😅
Absolutely! Y'all really like this, don't you?
Genre: Drama/ Fluff?
Words: 1588
TL;DR: Linda accidentally ends up telling Emma about he and Jane being switched at birth
TW: Swearing
Side note: if anyone has ideas/ sketches to elaborate on this headcanon... please do them and tag me. I wanna see them. I mean I’m kinda loving it.
______________________________________________________
Linda sipped at her coffee, sitting at one of the small tables in Beanies. She let her legs dangle a bit, blowing on her coffee to close it. For once it was piping hot. That probaby had something to do with the fact that she was now rather close with Emma Perkins, the barista who had made it. Jane's sister- her sister. And god, could she ever see it. How could her sister ever work in a cafe though? The cafe had technically closed about five minutes ago, but... the manager, Nora, was letting her and Emma Perkins stay a bit longer to have a chat alone. Emma sighed, bringing over her latte and siitting down with Linda.
"Your coffee okay?" Emma checked. "I know the coffee here isn't too great, but... I tried to make it a bit better. I put a pump of hazelnut in there, and-"
"It's wonderful. Thank you." Linda cut her off, sighing. "Was it a good day at work today?"
"Eh, same old same old." Emma chuckled. "People are assholes sometimes."
"Tell me about it." Linda scoffed, smirking. "Any fun stories?"
"Well... this one guy tried to actually make me *sing* for my tip." Emma rolled her eyes. "Because Nora mentioned while he as at the counter that she'd seen a cafe in god-knows-where doing it."
"Did you actally have to sing?" Linda winced.
"God, no." Emma snickered. "Listen, it's no official rule yet. There's no sign, and therefore Nora can't make me."
"Thank god." Linda laughed along with her.
"Hey!" Emma mocked offence. "I'll have you know that I'm a pretty great singer!"
"Really?" Linda quirked a brow, smirking.
"Oh yeah! I played Fiona in my high school production of Brigadoon." Emma smirked back, putting on the scottish accent for 'Brigadoon'. "I'm not really into theatre any more, but... I fucking killed that role."
"Interesting..." Linda sighed, just taking a look at Emma again.
Sometimes when Emma brought up these significant memories Linda couldn't help but feel a small pang of guilt. Because... she was this girl's older sister. She should have been there toshare those kinds of important moments with her. Not... not phony Jane Perkins. Who wasn't her sister. She liked Emma. A lot. Sure, Emma's life might be a bit grittier than her own, but... they had the same spunk. The same wit. Emma's was slightly less refined, and maybe a bit more crude, but it was there. In a lot of ways, it was like looking in a mirror. Both in looks and personality. That was, of course, if she had been a brunette.
"Hey, Linda, I've been meaning to ask you something." Emma bit her lip.
"Hm?" Linda hummed, indicating for her to go on.
"Why... why the sudden interest in me?" Emma asked carefully. "I mean, not that I don't love getting to actually get to know you- because you're great- but... I don't know. You're... you. You're rich, and your life is fabulous. And I'm me. A thirty-year-old barista at fucking Beanies."
"Well... I suppose I just felt drawn to you." Linda lied.
"Okay, no offence, but... bullshit." Emma sighed. "That's total bullshit! There's gotta be a reason."
"I simply noticed you at work, and... you reminded me of myself." Linda told her, inching closer to the truth.
"Really?" Emma blinked.
"You did... and you do. More and more with every second I spend with you." Linda nodded.
"But like... I know I'm repeating myself, but you're, like, fabulous. And I'm... me." Emma furrowed her brows.
"We've got the same spirit." Linda chuckled. "The same... spunk, if you will. The fire, and the sarcasm. We're peas in a pod."
"Is the sarcasm really that obvious just by looking at me?" Emma smirked.
"In the best way possible." Linda teased. There was a beat of silence between them as both sipped at their coffees.
"So... there was nothing more?" Emma checked.
"No... no, only that you're my sister." Linda sighed. A moment later she realized what she'd said.
"Pardon?" Emma blinked.
"I meant soul sister... sorry, it’s been a long day.” Linda chuckled nervously, hoping that would work.
"Okay, I would've believed that if you hadn't said anything, but... now that you've said it, it sounds so sketchy." Emma shook her head, stunned and suspicious. "What do you mean I'm your sister?"
"It's nothing. I misspoke." Linda blushed, looking to her feet.
"You're lying." Emma stated plainly. "I'm a little sister and a trouble maker. I read body language."
"Emma..." Linda pleaded, a pit in her stomach. She'd never meant to tell Emma. She had planned never to tell any of them.
"No, Linda. I want some fucking aswers." Emma demanded.
"No, you don't." Linda warned her. "Believe me... things will be a lot better if you just forget what I said.”
“No... Linda, you just called me your sister and then completely eliminated the ‘she’s jus being friendly’ context from the situation.” Emma stammered, clearly freaked out. “What the fuck is going on?”
“Fine.” Linda relented. “I didn’t want to tell you because... it’s fucked up, Emma. It really is. And it’s nothing I did, but... I still feel immensely guilty.”
“Just get to the fucking explanation!” Emma urged. 
“My parents- the people who raised me- paid a nurse off to switch me and your sister as babies... It was silly, really. They wanted a natural blonde baby.” Linda sighed. “All of that to say... Jane was never your biological sister. I was.”
“What the fuck...” Emma breathed, eyes wide. 
“That’s what I said when I read it in their financial files.” Linda sighed. She gave Emma a sympathetic look. “Now do you see why I didn’t want to say anything?”
“Um... yeah.” Emma nodded, still trying to take it in. “You’re my sister?”
“We can’t tell anyone, Emma.” Linda warned her. 
"Right...” Emma agreed. 
“It would cause too much of a fuss.” Linda sighed.
“Yeah...” Emma sighed. “So... what, did you start up this friendship because you felt guilty that your parents were heartless assholes who dumped their problem on my parents?”
“No. I did it because... if I had a sister, I wanted to know her. Even if she couldn’t know what she was to me.” Linda explained. “But... now you do, I suppose.”
“Yeah... I do...” Emma blinked. 
“Please... don’t be too mad at me?” Linda pleaded. “I genuinely just wanted to-”
“No, I’m not mad at you. You did nothing wrong.” Emma assured Linda. “Just... God. I always knew there was something fucking weird about Jane.”
“Really?” Linda quirked a brow. 
“Yeah... yeah, not even my parents understood where she got all the ambition and cunning from.” Emma nodded. “She was like... a total Slytherin. And I was very clearly a burnt-out Gryffindor. I mean, I’ve gone a little more Slytherin with my sarcasm over the years, but...”
“I’m sorry, a what?” Linda asked, confused. “Slithering?”
“Like... Hogwarts houses.” Emma checked. Linda stared blankly at her. “Oh my god... tell me my big sister knows what Hogwarts is...”
“I’m...” Linda started, before blinking. “Big sister?”
“Well, yeah... if you were switched with Jane, you’re my big sister.” Emma shrugged. 
“So... we’re alright, then?” Linda blinked. “Just like that?”
“Well... yeah. Yeah, why wouldn’t we be?” Emma chuckled. “Look, it’s a lot to get used to, but... you’ve pretty much handled everything right. And... I really appreciate that once you found out, you wanted me in your life.”
“And I want you to know that I really did make an effort to get to know you right when I found out.” Linda assured her. “I only discoved it when I was going through my parents’ financials while planning their funeral.”
“Yeah, I can get why they would never tell you.” Emma sighed. “I mean... god. That was terrible. No offence but... they kinda sound like terrible people.”
“Well... just like Jane, they were very ambitious.” Linda bit her lip. “And they had a weird thing about keeping the blonde hair in the family.”
“They sound like the Malfoys.” Emma whistled. 
“The who?” Linda asked, not recognizing that name.
“Right. You don’t know Harry Potter.” Emma remembered. “Okay, you know what? I think Paul’s at D&D with the boys from work tonight, so I’ve got the house to myself. You should come over, and we’ll watch as many of those movies as we can cram in.”
“Oh... okay.” Linda agreed. “Harry Potter... that sounds familiar.”
“It’s kinda a huge thing.” Emma chuckled. “You’re free, right?”
“Gerald’s taking the boys night golfing tonight, so yes.” Linda smirked. “Is this going to make me finally seem like a cool mom to my boys?”
“Probably.” Emma smirked back. “Alright... do you need a drive to my place?”
“I would appreciate one.” Linda nodded, following Emma out the door. 
Perhaps that day staying late at a mediocre coffee shop had been the start of something beautiful. Or perhaps it had already started before. It was, at least, the day that Linda and Emma fully embreaced their sisterhood. And it really was only the beginning of their story. They would continue to blossom and grow together, and navigate what whas a confusing but worthwhile journey. It’s funny how sometimes you don’t know how much you need something until it’s handed to you. That sentiment couldn’t be any truer than it was with the two new sisters. Emma was precisely what Linda had always needed, and Linda what Emma needed. Finally, at long last, they could embrace that. 
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pepper-mint · 4 years ago
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Update + New (HS-Focused) blog
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Helloooooo everybody! So, after a long long loooong talk with my friend and with myself, I decided to make a different blog to post my Homestuck fan art. The reason for this is that while this is my main blog and it’s going to keep being that way for a long time, it’s also a personal, safe space where I can post about my Sanscest fankids, something I haven’t done anywhere else (only on facebook and it was on my long forgotten page-) and while I have made HS fan kids too, it’s more easier for me to keep both things separated so I can organize myself more, do ya get me? I’m only one poor human trying to answer more than 800 asks I can’t mix them up with the ones I could get regarding my other kids.  
This blog, my blog has been a sacred space to me to have fun and make friends and I intent to keep it that way. Call me over-dramatic or whatever, but at the end of the day, I don’t care. This blog of mine will keep being my main and undertale-oriented (An Cookie Run too akjdksaa), while the other will be for my other things. However, I’ll still reblog my art here because duh why wouldn’t I? hehe e.e
So, to make things short: I got a new cool blog for my Homestuck homies. Go follow me there if you like homosuck and shitty fantrolls/fankids and if you’re a Dave Strider simp fan like me. Or if you like my art regardless of the fandom. Anyone is free to follow me e.e
my sexy blog -- @pipericho​
Also to anyone wonderin yes that’s my trollsona and her name is Mintti Peperi haha like pepper mint but altered im so original
Another super important thing!!!
So after this we getting back to our scheduled sanscest fankid content and I’ll be aswering your lovely asks (only after I finish my commissions. I can’t let my clients waiting!) but... I’ll only be answering the most recent ones.
Seriously guys... I just saw again and I have like 900 asks now. I can’t answer them all! So, I decided to take the decision of answering the most recent, posting your lovely submissions and the deleting all of the rest. I want my inbox to be clear for more of your nice asks and messages and even though I’d love to answer to the oldest ones, I can’t do it. So, if I never answered you, just send me another one (After I delete the asks guys, not now. I’ll tell you one I do it) or just look between the ones I’ve already answered. I get too many asks about the same thing! :0
ALSO ANOTHER THING
My carrd is ready so if you see a sudden post of me introducing to you, it’s because it’s the lovely post I’ll pin to my blog. That post will include, again, my carrd, my toyhouse link so you can see my sanscest kids and a link to my commission sheets cuz I have seen many people missing my lineless commissions. Seriously I have asked which style they want me to use and most of the time they don’t know I offer lineless ones e.e
So, see you later, lovelies!
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mrsfrecklesmarauders · 3 years ago
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Remus' Secret
Summary: The Marauders' first thoughts on Remus' secret. Part 2 of First Impressions.
TW: Mentions of abuse
REMUS P.O.V I had friends! I really learned to love those assholes. I knew they did stupid things sometimes, but I just felt so lucky to have friends at all. They made me feel normal, but that ment I was forgetting something. I was still a werewolf.
The year drove fast and I was back home, telling my mum about my adventures at Hogwarts and my new friends. "They sound awsome, Honey" she said smiling "I can't wait to meet them" "You haven't told them about..." my dad interrupted. He looked worried. "Lyall..." mum said "I'm just making sure" he answered "They might not like it" "Lyall!" "I haven't dad, don't worry" I couldn't. I knew it. Who was I kidding? I could pretend to be a normal boy, but I wasn't. If the boys found out what I was, there were gonna kick me out. And maybe I would get dragged out of Hogwarts and go back to being locked up. I couldn't let that happen. "I'll go back to my dorm" I said
But I didn't. I stood at the other side of the door listening. "Why did you do that Lyall? What do you keep saying those things?" "It's true. Those kids are gonna run away from a werewolf. Specially that Black, you don't know the Blacks" And you don't know Sirius. I thought "You should stop treating your son like a freak" mum said upset. "We need to treat him like a normal boy" "HE IS NOT NORMAL!" I jumped at that. Tears rolled down my cheeks. "He is not normal Hope" his voice was cracked "I just want to protect him. I don't want him to suffer more. He has been through so much" My mum started crying and dad hugged her. "I'm sorry darling. I'm sorry"
I couldn't take it anymore. I locked myself in my room. I was crying and air no longer entered into my lungs. I was breathing hard. When I saw a letter on my bed. It was from James. My friend. A friend I could not longer have, because I was a monster. I took the letter and broke it into a pieces. After crying a little more, I looked at the pieces of paper scattered on the floor. And I regretted breaking it. What was James saying? I wanted to know. I tried to join the pieces so I could see what was written.
'Dear Remus, How is your summer, brilliant boy? Mine is fine. I played lots of Quidditch with my dad. I also spent time with Frank Longbottom. He is nice. But he is not as mischivous as you guys, If you know what I mean. Listen. I've been owling Sirius but he hasn't answered. Asshole. Have you heard from him? I hope he is okay. James.'
Well, at least James was having fun, like a normal boy. And the rest of the summer I tried writing to Sirius but he didn't respond. "I was busy, you know?" he had said "Family meetings that I had to attend an' all" I knew he was lying. I could tell he didn't have a good summer. Just like me.
Second year went fine. Except I had to lie to my friends everytime. "Mum's sick" or "One of my relatives died" They weren't stupid. They knew something was up. "So what exactly does your mum have, Remus?" James asked "Yeah sounds pretty serious" said Peter "Ha Sirius" he joked "But honestly mate, Is she alright?" "Amm.." Fuck. What was I supposed to say? "We don't actually know.... But ..but it's not bad" I didn't want them to worry. "My mom used to be a healer, maybe we could ask her about it" said James "So it's not contagious?" asked Peter "Pete" protested Sirius "What?" he aswered "Remus looks ill sometimes. I thought..." Honestly my temper by now started racing. "Remus it's not sick" "You're fine, right mate?" "I WOULD BE IF YOU'D STOP ASKING!" The boys glanced at me in shock. "I... I'll take a walk" I said and stormed out of the dorm.
I didn't know were I was heading. I couldn't be angry at my friends. They were just worried. I was angry with myself, and my condition. I didn't want to lie to them anymore. But I had to. I was crying and running through a corridor, when I bumped into someone. "Mr. Lupin!" it was McGonagall "May I ask were are you running to?" "Sorry Professor" She saw my tears and her expression softened. "Come with me" she said
We got to her office. "Have a biscuit" she said offering them to me. I took one and I sat down. "Is everything okay?" No. It wasn't. And it will never be. But McGonagall gave me the confidence to tell her the truth. So I did. I told her everything. How I felt. And how I couldn't lie to my friends anymore. "Maybe I don't deserve friendship" I finished. "Mr. Lupin" she said "I'm gonna be honest. You are the first werewolf I've met. And I don't know how werewolves usually are, but if all of them are like you, then I don't know what everyone is worried about" I smiled at that. "I don't know how your friends are going to react if you tell them. But you should start accepting yourself first. And honestly, if you do tell them, and they don't accept you, there are not really your friends, are they?" "Do you think I should tell them?" I asked She sighed "That's up to you Mr. Lupin. No one else" "They just keep asking me where do I go, why do I look so sick?" "Then I suggest you make up a good story. So they won't ask anymore" she finished smiling.
I relaxed to her words. I didn't know if I was going to tell them. Honestly, I was too scared of loosing them. But I decided to relax and try to answer their questions. I could come up with a story, right? I wasn't going to be a normal boy, never. But I least I could try and pretend to be one.
I got back to our dorm. My friends were gathered across the floor talking with each other. As I entered they all looked at me. "Are you okay Remus?" Sirius asked me. I nodded. "Sorry for upsetting you mate, we were just worried" James said. Peter nodded. "We won't ask you anymore" I sat down with them. "It's okay" I said "I'm sorry for yelling. It's just that I'm not used to it. I've never had friends before. This is new to me" I sighed. The boys didn't say anything but they smiled. James rubbed my hair. "You ask away" I continued. They stayed silent for a while. "So you and your mum are okay?" Peter asked I nodded. "Yes" I lied "It's a condition in my family, we get sick easily. That's why I look like shit" I smiled. The boys laugh at that. But Sirius seemed still worried. "Do you get along... with your parents?" he asked me as if it was something weird. "Yes, they are brilliant" I said. I was worried though. Did Sirius had problems with his parents? "Remus" said James "Maybe we could go visit your mum with you someday" Damn. I felt guilty to lie again. But my dad was right. This was too good to be true. I couldn't spoil this. So I decided to lie again. Merlin, forgive me for being selfish. But I was happy with them. "Yes, perhaps" I said smiling "Enough of the sad talk" said Peter "I'm starving. Can we go to the kitchens like the last time?" "Well sorry Pete, it's not our fault" Sirus said then he grabbed my face "But look at this cute baby" "Arrgg, Sirius" I protested "He needs love doesn't he?" he continued "Oh yes he does" said James rubbing my hair. Peter laughed. "Merlin, I regret what I said. You're no my friends, you're so annoying!" I said sarcastically. "Oh you love us" said James giving me a kiss on the cheek. And yes he was right. I did love them. "Okay boys let's head to the kitchens" said James "Finally" said Peter "And we will use my cloak"
SIRIUS P.O.V My parents were no happy about me being a Gryffindor. All the yelling of my mother, and curses of my father prooved it. Even Reggie seemed disappointed. I told him Gryffindor was not that bad, if he could get in, he could be part of my gang. We would have so much fun. But no, he got into Slytherin, just like my parents wanted. That meant we were supposed to be enemies and again I was the only bad guy. But, you know what? I don't want to talk about it.
Instead I had a bigger issue. Remus. I didn't buy his story about his mum. Something didn't fit up. If he really liked his parents, then why did he seem so sad when he leave, and so annoyed and tired when he return? It was the same sick feeling I got when I was going to see my parents, or my other family members. And he avoided talking about them. Just like I avoided talking about mine. If there's something you don't know about me, is that I like mysteries. Me and Reggie used to wonder around Grimmaund Place finding them. But Remus Lupin was the biggest mystery so far and I was going to solve it.
I had my suspicions already. But it wasn't confirmed until I saw them. Remus' scars. I didn't mean to, I swear. James and I were about to practice for Quidditch this year, since he wanted to be on the team, but I forgot my gloves, it was freezing outside, so I went back to get them, when I saw him. Remus was changing in the loo, door slightly opened. His back was covered in tiny scars. Holy shit. He didn't got those from the bikey thing, he told us about. It was impossible. I was sure of that.
So I told my concerns to the boys, while he was 'visiting his mum' again. "I'm really worried about Remus" I said out of the sudden. Honestly that was all I was focused on. "What are talking about?" asked James I couldn't tell them about the scars. Could I? It was none of my business. "I don't know" I answered "Don't you think is suspicions? He goes there almost every month?" Honestly it seemed like a pattern. "Mate, we promised not to ask anymore remember?" said James "His mum is sick" added Peter "Yes but he doesn't talk about his family. He flicks every time I ask him something. And you guys talk about your families a lot" I hoped I could get to the point. "You don't talk about your family either" said James in suspicion. Shit. I didn't say anything. I didn't know how to tell them what I thought. Everything fitted. "Maybe he is just shy?" suggested Peter "Honestly mate, what are you so worried about?" James asked. "He said he and his mum were fine" Blimey! How could they not see it? "Nothing" I said relaxing "I guess you are right, he is just with his mum, yeah?"
They wouldn't understand. James had cool parents. Peter's mum always sent him sweets. I always thought that all the curses and punishment were normal, a way of educating children. Until I came to Hogwarts. I was the only one with harsh parents. Well, if my suspicions were correct, Remus as well. If anything I should ask him. And tell him he is not alone. Maybe we could do something about it.
So I found him on the library. And decided to confront the situation. "Hey nerd" I said smiling as I sat down. He looked at me. "Sirius?" "The very same" I grinned "Tell me something only Sirius would know". "What?" "Do it" "Fine" I said thinking "Emm... You use pijamas with little fish on them" I smirked Remus rolled his eyes "Sharks. And they are badass" I smiled "What was that all about?" Sometimes Remus came up with the most bizarre comments. "I needed to make sure it was really you, not someone on a polyjuice potion" he said I looked at him puzzled. "I think this is your first time in the library" Oh. I laughted so hard, Mrs. Pince looked at me. "Sorry" "So what are you doing here?" he asked "No pranks?" "I think Peeves got that covered" "What did he do?" "He started a wiped cream fight on the Great Hall, ten minutes ago" "Really?" asked Remus laughing. I nodded. "Well, you're now on the library, so you'll have to read a book" he continued "Arrgg" I protested. "Take this one"
While Remus grabbed the book from the table, his sleeve rolled up a bit and I saw on his arm a big thick scar. Honestly, Remus had distracted me until now, but I remembered what I was going to ask him. "That's a new one" I said out loud without thinking. "What?" I pointed to his arm. "Your arm Remus, you didn't have that scar" I tried to grab his arm, but he pulled away. "Remus. Is your dad hitting you?" Sometimes I didn't think before speaking. That got me into trouble at home. But I just needed to know. "What?" "You can tell me if something is going on" "What are you talking about Sirius?" he sounded angry. "Remus you have scars everywhere" "I told you those were..." "Those are not from a fall" "WHAT DO YOU KNOW, HA?" he yelled "Remus..." "NO. YOU DON'T KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT MY FATHER, OR MY FAMILY, OR ME" "But.." "Just stop talking nonsense" he stood up "leave me alone" "Remus" but he stormed out of the library.
I apologized to Remus. I promised not to say anything about his father anymore. But I still believed something was up. So when he said goodbye a few weeks later, I knew what I had to do. "Goodbye Remus" I said casually "Said hello to your mother from us" But when he closed the door I stood up. "We need to follow him" My dormmates looked at me. "What?" James asked looking away from his Quidditch magazine "To where?" "To wherever he goes" I said "Give me your cloak James" "Are you insane?" James asked "He went to see his mum" said Peter concerned "Like always" "We've talked about this mate" said James "No, no" I said impaciently "You don't understand. You didn't see them" "Saw what?" Peter asked "HIS SCARS" I yelled. Shit. The boys looked at me in shock. "Yes we know..." James began saying but I cut him off. "No, he has scars all over his body. Everytime new ones..." I swallowed "I think his father is hitting him. Maybe he is hitting his mum too". Peter opened his mouth. James was kind of angry. "What kind of father would do that?" he asked. Mine, I thought. "We'll have to follow him. Just to see if it's true" I said "But we'll get in so much trouble" said Peter "Sirius is right" said James opening his trunk "If this is true we need to save him. And punch that wanker in the face" I smiled at that. I loved my best friend. Peter seemed still shocked. "Get under my cloak" James said. And as we did we went to wonder the corridors to save Remus.
JAMES P.O.V I've never imagined something like that could happen. But as we wondered the corridors after Remus, Sirius told us everything he knew and it all made sense. I wish this was all a lie. If it wasn't I swore to myself I was going make everything to send that man to Azkaban. Nobody messes up with my friends. Specially Remus that turned out to be really funny and intelligent. He was so cool, I jugded him wrong.
Remus got to the Hospital Wing where Madam Pomfrey was waiting for him. "Are you ready handsome?" she said smiling "You know I never am" answered Remus. I could see he looked really pale and sick. And I got worried. "It's okay hon" she said and took Remus by the shoulder. We let Pomfrey and Remus get advantage. "What is Remus doing with Poppy?" asked Sirius. I agreed with him. This didn't look great. "She is a healer" Peter said "It's obvious that his mum is really sick. Maybe she went to help? Maybe we can get back?" "Shut up Pettigrew" I said "Flich could be around" I looked at Sirius who seemed very upset and concerned. I nodded, he did it as well. "Let's go" I said ignoring Peter.
We followed them being as quiet as possible. Eventhough we were under the cloak, they could've heared us. My heart was beating fast and I knew my friends' as well. We didn't want to know what we would find, but we had to. They stopped in front of the Whomping Willow. "What are they doing here?" I asked quietly "No idea" said Sirius "But how are they gonna get close? The Willow will crush them" said Peter "Shut up Peter" I said "You want them to hear you?" "I was just asking" "That is your problem, you ask too much"
Suddenly the Willow stopped moving and there was an opening, through which Pomfrey and Remus entered. We looked at each other puzzled. "How did she do that?" I asked "There's a knot on the trunk that makes it still" said Sirius "And honestly if you would stop fighting, you would've seen it as well" We stayed in silence for a while. I took the cloak off us. "I don't think anyone would see us now" "So what do we do now?" asked Peter Sirius was looking intrigued at the tree. "Go after them" "Thought the tunnel?" asked Peter scared "Well, we are not gonna see anything from here" responded Sirius "Where do you think it leads?" I asked now curious "Maybe to Remus' house?" suggested Peter We both looked at Peter. He could be dump sometimes. "Really, why would a passage at Hogwarts would lead to a student's house?" "Don't know!" Peter said "Maybe" said Sirius "We should go and find it out" he was annoyed and looking for something on the floor. "Right" I said "Peter press the knot" "What?" he said "The Willow would hit me" "It won't" "Will" "You're the shorter one" "You do it James"
"Lads! Lads! Shut up!" said Sirius "Got the solution" he got a big stick on his hand. "Right, or we could do that" I said Suddenly the hole on the trunk opened up and my heart raced. Shit. I picked the cloak and got us all in in time. Madam Pomfrey went out with tears in her eyes. "Poor boy, Merlin! What did he do to deserve it?" and she entered the castle. We all went pale. As she left, Sirius pressed the knot with the stick. The Willow stopped again. And we jumped into the unknown.
The first thing I noticed was darkness and too much cold. "Boys?" I said "Yeah" said Sirius "Here" said Peter Sirius casted Lumos and we could see we were on a tunnel. We swallowed. "I think I'm scared now" said Peter. You always are, I thought. "What is Remus doing here?" Sirius and I exchanged glances. We looked worried. Maybe his father brought him here. To Merlin knows what. But why was Madam Pomfrey helping? Suddenly we heard a sound. "What was that?" I said "Nothing" Sirius said "Come on lads, we are almost there" He started walking and we followed. Peter looked paIe and sick. Me? I loved adventures and mysteries. And I was going to fight with whoever was there. But I was really scared for Remus. What if something happened to him? Then we heard howls and grunts. "Okay, you cannot tell me that was nothing" I said "That sounded like a dog" said Peter not so pleased. "Maybe Remus is in danger" Sirius yelled "Let's go!" And he ran towards the sound. "Is he insane?" asked Peter looking at me. I smiled "Maybe a little" how I adored my best friend "Let's go" And we followed Sirius. While we run I thought of all the spells I had learned I could use. Those included Jellyjinks, Tallantalegra and Expeliarmus. I didn't thought those were useful. We got to where Sirius was. There was a door. He looked at me and I nodded preparing myself to fight, to save Remus. "Allohomora" he said and the door cracked open. And the next thing we saw changed my life forever. A big, actually enormous wolf stood in front of us. Growling. "Aaaaaaaaarrrrgggg" the three of us yelled. And we ran out of there as soon as we could.
If you ask me now, I couldn't even tell you how we got out of there alive. But as we got to the castle the last person we wanted to see was waiting for us. Filch, with Mrs. Norris on his arms. "Now, you are in so much trouble" he said grinning.
He took us to Dumbledore's office, where he was reading a knitting magazine. I couldn't even think straigth. So many feelings and thoughs were in my brain. So I didn't process the hole thing until Filch spoke. "Headmaster. I found these boys entering the castle. I saw them exit the Whomping Willow. At the full moon. Surely you will expell them. And the other boy" I saw my friends. Sirius had an unreadable expression. Peter seemed like he was going to vomit. Dumbledore finally looked up. "Thank you Argus" he said smiling "I'll handle it from here" Flich smiled at us evily. "You can go Argus" He grunted but left. As soon as he shut the door we exploded. "Dumbledore..." "Big wolf..." "We didn't mean to .." "We were worried..." "Don't expell us...." "What is happening?" We all talked at the same time. Dumbledore raised his hand and we shut up. "I guess you figured out everything by now" he said calmly. "So is true?" Sirius spoke. But I knew what he was going to ask "Is Remus Lupin a werewolf?"
PETER P.O.V Holy freaking macaronis!! I surely didn't expect this. Remus? A-werewolf?? When I came to Hogwarts didn't know my life would turn out this way, "Yes" answered Dumbledore "he is".
My eyes opened like plates. I looked at my friends but their expressions were not the same as mine. They were smiling at each other. "Wow" said Sirius "How did that happen?" "Why didn't he say anything to us?" James asked. I looked at them. How could they be so calmed? "I think that's something you should ask Mr. Lupin yourselves" Dumbledore said "Now my concerns rely in a very simple question: What were you doing out of bed and following Mr. Lupin?" He looked directly into our eyes. Damn we would surely be expelled this time.
We lowered our gaze. "Sorry' said Sirius finally "It was my fault"
"Well we followed you" said James. Seriously was he insane? He wanted us all to be expelled? But I sighed. "Yes we did" I said. Sirius smiled at us. "And why do you say that Mr. Black?"
Sirius sighed "I thought his father was hitting him" Dumbledore went very pale.
"I'm sorry' said Sirius. I thought he was about to cry "I just saw his scars and.."
"Well" interrupted Dumbledore "I have met Mr. and Mrs. Lupin and I can assure you they are good people"
Sirius nodded. We all were silent for a while. I didn't know what to think. I had to talk it through with my friends. I had so many questions. "Now, since you are quite good friends for Mr. Lupin, trust you treat him normally. And help him on what he needs" Dumbledore continued. James and Sirius nodded. I did it as well.
"And I'm not going to expel you since your intentions were pure, but you will recieve several detentions" he looked at us from above his glasses. "And I trust you will never do such thing again. It is extremely dangerous. You see, a werewolf doesn't recognize anyone on the full moon. He might hurt you"
I was shocked at his words. Hurt us? I swallowed. As we got back to our dorm none of us were tired to sleep. And my friends couldn't stop talking. They commented on how cool was to have Remus as friend. How cool it was that he was a werewolf. And what should we do to help him.
Me? | wasn't that happy. I just keep picturing the wolf big and furious and then I picturing Remus smiling and quiet reading a book.
"So do you think we should tell him that we know?" James asked.
"Yes of course we need to tell him we support him. That he should not lie anymore, don't you think?" answered Sirius.
"Yeah you are right" said James. I nodded. "Wicked when I first met Remus, I never thought he could be so interesting"
Sirius smiled "Now we have a secret that would bond us forever"
I couldn't sleep that night. I had so many nightmares with Remus, the werewolf attacking us. Blood everywhere. I used to have many nightmares when was little. Mum was always there to bake me some cookies or something. Now I was alone. I couldn't tell the boys, they would get angry. I stared Remus empty bed for the rest of the night.
The next morning we bearly went through classes. The three of us were really tired. But James and Sirius were excited. They couldn't wait to talk to Remus. I wasn't that much.
That afternoon Remus came into our dorm. Pale and sick as ever. But as usual he smiled at us. I didn't know why, the moment I saw him, all the memories from my nightmare came back to me.
"Hello boys" he said. Every word caused him trouble. James and Sirius exchanged glances smiling.
"How was your mum, Remus?" asked Sirius
"Am.." Remus sat on his bed "Yeah, perfect"
"Why do you look so pale Remus?" asked James
"I didn't sleep last night. Not quite" Remus answered kind of closing his eyes. I didn't understand. Weren't we going to tell him we knew?
James and Sirius started laughing. I slightly smiled.
Remus looked at us puzzled. "What is happening?"
"Remus we know" said James
"Good" said Remus "Know about about what?"
"You know" said Sirius smirking
"Your furry little problem" added James
"That you're a werewolf" I said quietly
Remus almost fell out of bed. "I'm sorry" he said with tears on his eyes
"For what Remus?" Sirius asked
"I'm a monster, I understand if you don't want to be my friends"
"What? No! Nonsense" said James "We don't mind"
"We don't care" said Sirius "Besides you fold your socks" he smiled "You're everything but a monster"
I didn't say anything. Did I care? But Remus was crying.
"Really?" he asked "You're not grossed out? Or scared?"
"No" James and Sirius protested
"And we won't tell anyone, we promise" added Sirius.
"Amm. my voice bearly came out "Can I ask you what happened? How did you become a..."
"A werewolf Pete" James said "You can say it, you know?"
I didn't answer I just went very red.
"Can we?"
"It's okay" said Remus "I was bitten by one when was four"
"Four?" asked Sirius shocked
Remus nodded "Who did it?"
"I don't know" he said "Dad said it was a random attack"
"Does it hurt?' asked Sirius carefully
"Only when I transform" Remus answered "And sometimes after"
We all looked at each other
"Do you remember anything?" asked James
"Just pieces, but mostly no"
Suddenly I felt a knot on my throat. I saw Remus sick and broken. And thought how much Remus had gone through. It wasn't his fault. Was it? And I felt guilty for thinking badly about Remus. He was my friend. Tears rolled down on my cheeks.
"Are you crying Peter?" asked James
"No" I lied wiping out my tears.
Remus smiled at me.
"Thank you boys" said Remus with his eyes sparkling. "You are really good friends"
"Aaah" said Sirius embracing Remus "Come here sweet boy"
"I love you guys" said James joining the hug
"I love you too" I said joining the hug
And it was true. I adored this assholes so much. Even Remus. And I wasn't scared of him anymore.
"Maybe we should get a cool name for our gang" said James suddenly. And we all laughed. Everything was fine.
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dothegravitybounce · 4 years ago
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Well here* it is my review for The Queen's Weapon
*that is a goodreads link by the way
This book was a good addition to the Black Jewels Series and I'm here to prove it.
For that, I have to first say that I'm on Surreal's side always will and always will be. The first time I ever read Daughter of the Blood I hated it, and I mostly hated Surreal. The story and its basic concepts stayed with me, at the back of my head, always singing for me to come back, enough that 2 years later I picked it up again and fell in love with it. At my second read the first thought that went through my mind was how similar I was to Surreal, we talk the same way, have somewhat similar backgrounds, react to the world the same way, we're physically described similarly as well. That's when I knew this book had a message for me.
I feel like a lot of fans of the series, even the ones who proclaim to have Surreal as a favorite, undermine her role in the books. She is a lot of the times a driving force, a catalyst for the plot to move forward. In the first book only, she is the second point of view we're introduced, she is Dorothea granddaughter, she finds Briarwood before everyone else, she gets to meet every sigle one of the girls in there, and the end culminates with her saving Jaenelle Angelline (and Daemon). This is no small part, she's not our main character of course, that's clearly Daemon (if after 11 books you still think it's Jaenelle, then please there's no way to be discussing the book then), but she clearly has great importance to the story and that's why I'm convinced, at the end of The Queen's Weapons, that Anne Bishop wasn't actually trying to undo any of what's happened before.
And there's reasons to it. Anne Bishop's first published work is a short story called "Match Girl", published in a collection book before The Black Jewels existed. If you're a snoopy like me, you'll probably get around to reading it. The story is a retelling of the fairy tale "The little match girl", but beyond that, it's a suspiciously familiar story of a orphaned girl who has to roam the streets and ends up in prostitution to be able to survive, at all times she dreams of crossing a suspiciously familiar mountain where things are right and she could finally be happy. Reminds you of anything?
After 11 books things are not different. All of the short stories for The Black Jewels are centered around Surreal. I feel like a lot of the fans haven't read them, but my favorite is "The Price" and it should be available in the main books, it's very very short but in its few words it tells a lot about what happens inside Surreal's mind and tells a lot about her relationship with Daemon as well, if you haven't read it you should. Lots of people say they've skipped Tangled Webs when they shouldn't. That book is relevant, all of them are there's no skipping if you want to truly understand this story. But that one is relevant to Twilight's Dawn and following.
The Queen's Weapons is an answer to a fan favorite question of how Dorothea came to be. And it does provides an aswer, I'll be nice and resume it for you now: it's convenience. Dorothea, and now Delora are convenient people in which evil can hide. "If she can do it, why can I not?" This is a phrase constantly repeated by Jaenelle Saetien throughout the book. "Everyone else can do it".
Oh Jaenelle Satien... this was a master play by Anne, honestly. Who's better to go through this journey of discovering how Dorothea came to be then her own offspring. The Black Jewels have always worked by telling the story with parallels, you need to understand them to understand its message. In result, a lot is left in between the lines and the reader has to put the work in. This is something that I've always criticized about the books, even though in this one I feel like Anne tried to be as direct and clear as she could without treating the audience as idiots. In Queen's Weapon though, characters lines are usually followed by a piece of thought or narrative that explains exactly the intention and the feelings behind. That's not something that happens in the previous books, so readers do come with misjudgements to this one.
And misjudgements is the one word for this experience. Before the book released, we were all bombarded with the news that things weren't going to go smoothly and that, sadly, the child we all thought would be the most precious ever, was in the center of trouble. We wanted to hate her, we already hated her but I don't think Anne will let us. Having read it now, I'm glad that Jaenelle Satien is the person she is and that she committed the mistakes she did. An incredible character and another very brave choice from our author. Make her be the perfect follow up for Jaenelle Angelline, be an angel with no mistakes? No, why would you choose the boring path? Make her powerful, curious and inquisitive like Jaenelle Angelline, make her tenacious, stubborn, self reliant and a free spirit like her mother Surreal, and make her ambitious and rebellious like her grandmother Dorothea. This is honestly an amazing combination, I came out of this book wanting to know who Saeti will become and what she'll go through. This is a story worth telling, I know that Titian and Daemonar will be okay in the future because they see themselves as extensions of the family. Saeti, on the other hand knows she's not and she has to become something that is only hers.
And that's the most brilliant of it all. Jaenelle Saetien is Daemon, Surreal AND Jaenelle Angelline's dreams made flesh. What these 3 have in common? The whish to be themselves fully. This is a common thing between Daemon and Surreal through these lasts books, and is said by Jaenelle Angelline to Saeti: "you're me but without the pain". And it's true, if Jaenelle Angelline had never seen the horrors that people under Dorothea's wing could do she'd become like her or even worse. "Everyone one else can do it" why can't she not? She's more powerful isn't she? This is a perfect parallel. Jaenelle Satien is Jaenelle Angelline without the pain but also without the burden and responsibilities that comes with her jewel and position. The lesson with The Black Jewels was always that with power and privilege, responsibility and care are necessary, otherwise it brews corruption, it's not a coincidence that our heroes and villains are rulers. And the lesson is still the same here. Isn't that exactly what we've been seeing in the world in these lasts times? Well I digress.
For Jaenelle Satien her way to find herself and be fully herself was to disconnect from her family. Isn't that exactly Jaenelle Angelline's journey? That she chose again and again to sacrifice herself even after death to stand up for her responsibilities and take care of her loved ones? From not leaving Chaillot before being hurt because she had to protect Wilhemina, to all the way coming back from her existence solely on the Misty Place to take care of the family. She cannot be herself fully, she has always to be Queen, to be Witch so the realms can be reminded of the right ways. That's her burden, and without that burden Jaenelle Satien falls into Delora's trap. That was Dorothea's plan in the first book: find who was the special girl, take her from her family and raise her under her control.
Jaenelle Satien doesn't come out wrong because of her parents misdoings, Daemon and Surreal aren't bad parents AT ALL. They did and gave her the best, they just didn't want her to have the same nightmares as they did. She does what she does because she doesn't want to embrace those who came before her, because she wants something that is solely hers. Then why Lucivar's children don't come out like that? At first, I was also thinking they were narratively privileged, that Anne was on their side and not on JS side, trying to demonize her, but in truth it's none of that. It's on these characters essences, they WANT to be their families follow up, so they ask for guidance and help when needed. Jaenelle Satien simply doesn't, it's not on her nature, she's a free spirit, curious, stubborn, ambitious like her predecessors. She wants to discover the world by herself and only by herself and by that she cuts her family and hurts them. She had countless of times to talk about what was going on, about her insecurities, to doubt Delora and her friends, even at the house party at the end she had at least 3 different times to come around, but because she felt like a shadow she chose not to.
Isn't that exactly what happened with Surreal in the Queen's Bargain? Thinking that she had to solve everything by herself, alone and refuse help? At the time I read that book, I honestly thought that it was trying to undermine Surreal like a lot of readers thought too, making a villain of an adored character. After a re-read and specially after reading this one, I understand everything so much better. Surreal was making her family a burden to herself because she thought she had to, "isn't that what everyone else does?", she thought she had to be absolutely perfect to be married to Daemon, to erase her past. Isn't that the lesson she learned in the last book? That like everyone else in the family she could ask for help, she could lean on the others and on Witch, she didn't have to forget who she was and what she went through, she just had to actively make the choice to ask? And again, I talked about it in my last review, the one thing that would make me give up my love for The Black Jewels was if the relationship between Surreal and Jaenelle Angelline was destroyed. And this book just strengthens it, every single interaction between them made me cry tears of joy. Witch made sure she wasn't something between Surreal's family, but something that could bring it together. Even then, she gives Surreal the choice to leave if she didn't feel like that's enough, if she didn't feel like she's being done right and she'll not be judged if she decides to leave. And Surreal doesn't leave, after all this is her family and her love, why would she give up everything when she can have a nice relationship with Daemon the rest of his life (like literally, he promised), be with friends and family? Why would she choose loneliness? Some of us even thought that she would commit suicide, or die or be written off, but why? That would be the bad choice from Anne Bishop. That is the ending villains get, actual characters we're supposed to hate. Our heros learn their lessons and find happiness in their own way, isn't it? And that's how I know that Surreal and Saeti are treasured characters just like everyone else, they're just the catalysts, the things that make the story move forward and they're important.
And oh Daemon and Surreal.... I think I can not put into words how much I love these two. Together and separate. Before coming to this book, I thought that the events would drive them apart. It doesn't happen, they actually have never been this love dovey in any other books! Not even when Jaenelle Saetien goes against Surreal, not even when Daemon is told he'd have to kill JS. They were always there for each other, from discovering all the atrocities being done in Dhemlam to parting ways from their daughter.  And mostly important, something that bothered me and others in the last book, HE comes for her, he never dismisses her, acknowledges all her grievances stays by her side and respects all their boundaries. After all wasn't that exactly what they were for each other back in the first book when they still lived in Terreille? Friends, true partners. It's a beautiful love story honestly, from the very first book they have a beautiful love story. I feel like everyone always sees their love story as beginning in Twilight's Dawn, but after countless rereads of the entire series, I know their love story has been told little by little since the first book. Paralleling and intertwined with Daemon's love with Jaenelle Angelline but always there, and The Queen's Weapons just reinforces this. It's not your easy rom-com romance, this is a love story that goes beyond husband and wife and that makes it even more special. The same way Daemon and Jaenelle's love story goes beyond life and death. I love these two, I love what Anne Bishop built with them, I have never found a couple I adored this much in any piece of media, romance or not, that equals the strength that exists here. It's unparalleled and I would choose to go through it all again.
Some people finished the book thinking they're going to live a separate life but that's not what's is implied at all. Surreal talks about and is involved in the school at the Hall, she specifically talks about the tutors joining the family table for dinner, and she's involved in the organization of the students house settling like choosing their dorms and all. She's clearly involved, she's not going anywhere people lol. I think everyone interpreted that way because of her conversation with Jaenelle, she metions getting a house away from Daemon. But I saw it as a direct response to her knowing that he'll die sooner than she thought and before her. He's a constant on her life, the person she trusts the most and is mostly familiar with since always. She'll have to eventually learn how to live without him, get used to the idea so it doesn't happen like Saetan or Rainier whom she lost suddenly.
Wich brings me back to her broken motherly bond with Jaenelle Saetien. I think people are misinterpreting that as well. Do you honestly think she stopped loving her daughter? Is that what you actually read? Did she not cry because her daughter words hurt, and because Jaenelle Saetien was being blind to her mistakes, like a mother does? Did she not cry when she found out that Jaenelle Saetien was going to be executed? Was she not scared of whatever punishment Witch put over JS? Didn't she care for Jaenelle Satien's body all the days she was stuck in the Briarwood nightmare, like a mother? Didn't she, after all that happened, welcome Jaenelle Saetien to the sanctuary she founded because she thought it would be a good way for the girl to overcome her mistakes and the things she saw at Briarwood, the same way it was for herself?? Are none of these motherly actions? Is this what someone that never cared for that role, for the child would do? Isn't it unfair to say their relationship was shallow, fake? Because that's not what I read. She gives up the title of Mother yes, because that's what Jaenelle Saetien wants, and she knows she'll regret. She tells Daemon exactly that, Jaenelle Saetien will regret judging her mother because that's what she did with Titian, and she regrets it. Doesn't she talk specifically about how similar they are? She'll never stop loving her like a mother, never stop caring.
That is exactly what Daemon's says on his last interaction with Jaenelle Saetien at the end of the book when he says that yes they can exchange letters, he'll never stop caring for her even if she decides to distance herself. And oh my god in this part I ugly cried like never before, it wasn't tears while reading it was full on bawling, I actually had to put my phone (yay expensive ebook gang!!) away. The Black Jewels is very comforting because to me and a lot of the other fans it touches on scars and helps heal them. Maybe that's why I can't see the wrongs people are seeing in this one. But this moment was a treasure to me, absolutely special.
And oh Daemon... Can we ever love you any less?? Do we love you too much?? Will we have to, like Surreal, start to brace ourselves to let go of you because your time is coming? Will you, like your father leave us with only the memories of the love we had for you? Are we ever going to find comfort elsewhere or are you truly the perfect hero?
I never liked male protagonists. I would actually avoid them at all costs. Maybe if I never had come into The Black Jewels thinking it was a story about Jaenelle and Daemon would solely be her tag along, I wouldn't be able to like him as much as I do now. Everyday I get impressed on how much of a perfect fantasy he is from beginning to end. On the facebook group we get posts about actors people think could have his face, we go from radom male models, to the newest (and best imo) addition Rege-Jean Page, to people who refuse to give him a face because no real beauty would suit him. A perfect fantasy inside and out of the book. Before coming into this I thought this book would finally spoil Daemon for me. In my last review I said I didn't want him to regress into who he was at the Trilogy, a messy, lost, purposeless man who lived to chase something he thought was lost. And that's not what he gets, if not he learns once again that he has to stay and be connected to the living, pass on his knowledge, take care of the realm and love his family until his body can't stay alive anymore. Different from his father that spent centuries locked out in hell, who lost a son (Peyton, the favorite before Daemon came along) to Dorothea and Hekatah's interferences. He refuses to give up on Jaenelle Saetien, I don't know if the parallels between Peyton and her were intentional, but they're certainly there. It's such a simple lesson for him that it makes me wonder if being simple is exactly what makes Daemon as a character so good. I KNOW this is not the end to The Black Jewels, because we'll have to see Daemon's final moments. And I'm honestly not sad, like him I don't want to rush that moment, but I know it will be a beautiful ending to a beautiful journey and I'll happily wait.
To end this infinite wall of text. Zoey is a nice addition and brings representation to a series that had almost none. I love her relationship with Titian, I think they'll grow up well and there's a lot of world and lore exploration that could be done with this so I'd like to see them in the future. Daemonar is like Lucivar the voice of reason, I don't like him as much as I like Lucivar but Anne Bishop clearly has plans for him (as said in Tersa's vision) so we'll see what's going to come. In the last book I felt like Lucivar was a bit tossed to the side as well, but I'm happy in this one he and Daemonar could get closer to Witch, but then again it's just the character essence, he's simply not prone to drama so it's hard to not get overshadowed by everything else going on. Marian is surprisingly always funny, I did thought she'd get a bit more scenes, but it's nothing really important or that hindered my enjoyment.
I feel like this book required a lot of maturity to deal with expectations and attachments to characters, from the author and from the readers. And I'm pleased with the results, messing with your characters happy endings and still coming out with a good story that reinforces the thematic outline of the entire series, calls back and resolves past issues and events and delivers even more interesting characters is not an easy task, you have to be a brave author to face the fact your reader might have different interpretations that'll result in them disliking your book. And to me Anne Bishop dealt with this perfectly, I feared I was going to be manipulated into a story and that's not how I came out of it all, despite already judging the story badly from spoilers and early reviews. I came to this book expecting to hate it and say goodbye to the series. She convinced me to fall in love with the Black Jewels again, after 11 books nonetheless!!!! This is no easy task at all, it requires a lot of skill. I admire her work a lot. If you've been saddened and disappointed by either The Twilight's Dawn or The Queen's Weapon give this book a chance. A fair one, read it for what it is and not what you idealize it to be. You'll catch yourself feeling very similarly to when you first read Daughter of the Blood, whatever that might mean to you personally.
Anyway, this book was ridiculously long for a Black Jewels book, so this review is ridiculously long as well, also I paid R$100 on this so I'll write a wall of text if I want to. I actually ended up liking that it was long, it had space for the necessary scenes to happen in a well told way, so I'm not complaining. Except for the Scelties, I hate them, have always hated them and will forever hate them. (I'm zoophobic animals as pets is not a reality to me they're just beasts, but I guess they're cute ones lol)
See y'all in the next one 😘 (or in the comments section, or in the next reread idk)
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rwbyvein · 5 years ago
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Albion:  Inference:  Part II/II
Jaune walked down the streets of Mistral with his left arm wrapped around Weiss and his right wrapped around Yang.
Jaune: We do need to talk about something.
Weiss: Oh?
Jaune: Which one of you am I going to marry?
Weiss and Yang: *stop with shock*
Jaune: Because I am definitely going to marry one of you. I would rather treat you both as well, but apparently I cannot.
Weiss and Yang: *stare into each other's eyes*
Weiss: B... b... b... Our courtship has just begun!
Jaune: Our courtship just succeeded. That is the next obvious step.
Yang: *tears start rolling down her cheek*
Yang (blubbering): I've never been so happy...
Jaune: *hugs them both tightly*
Weiss: *gives Yang a quick kiss on the lips*
Weiss: It seems she needs it more than I do...
Jaune: Don't mistake this. I won't be committed any less to the mistress.
Weiss: Legally, you are supposed to...
Jaune (powerful whispering): I - don't - care. You are both mine. You are both too precious to let go.
Yang: *crying into Jaune's shoulder*
Weiss: *beautiful quiver*
Weiss: His flaw is apparently that he loves too freely.
Jaune: Don't pretend that this happened overnight. This has been happening since I first met you two.
Weiss: I will have to cease indulging your every whim.
Yang: *still crying into Jaune's shoulder*
Jaune: Whatever debt you owe me, I think it's paid.
Weiss: *sniffing*
Weiss: Not if you propose to me like this... us... Yang....
Jaune: *pulls Weiss into his shoulder*
Jaune: Shh.
Yang and Weiss: *embrace each other*
Jaune: *holds them close*
Jaune: Snow Angel?
Weiss: *affirmative sniffle*
Jaune: You are the one with the most to lose...
Weiss: *sniffles into his chest*
Weiss: *slowly pulls away*
Weiss: *wipes her eyes*
Weiss: I am already... disinherited... I have little left to lose... but oh so much to gain... Father would absolutely HATE if I was the kept mistress and not the wife.
Yang: *moves away from Jaune's chest*
Yang: The hell?, I get to be wife to spite your father... You do hate your father...
Weiss: *rolls her eyes and wipes them*
Weiss: I did ALSO say that you seemed to need it more than I do... And I do love you more than I hate my father...
Yang: *pulls Weiss in for a powerful hug*
Weiss: *tries not to react as her face is mashed into Yang's breasts*
* * *
Jaune: Have you girls calmed down a bit?
Weiss and Yang: *nod*
Jaune gets down on one knee and pulls out a pair of jewelry boxes, each containing a ring. The one he held to Yang was gold and had a dragon and a sun etched into it. The one he held to Weiss was silver and etched with angelic wings and snow flakes.
Weiss and Yang stood, struck dumb. Jaune knelt still, trying his best to keep his balance. It wasn't until Jaune nearly fell over that they rushed over to grab his arms. The two kneeled down, still holding his arms, just staring wide-eyed with shock.
Weiss and Yang shouted over each other as they tried to speak, and both, quickly turned silent. They looked at each other, having a silent conversation, deciding that Weiss would be the one to speak.
Weiss: I have several questions.
Yang: They can wait until we give him an aswer.
Weiss: I... suppose... they can...
Yang: *tackles Jaune*
Jaune: *does his best to keep the rings up in the air as he's tackled to the ground*
Weiss: *swats Yang*
Weiss: Brutish!..
Yang: *looks at Weiss*
Weiss: ...well... Dragon...
Yang: *grabs her ring, slips it onto her finger and sticks her tongue out at Weiss*
Weiss: *SCOFF*
Jaune: *with his now free hand, slips Weiss' ring onto her ring finger*
Weiss: *loving huff*
Weiss: Can I... now... ask my questions?..
Yang: We do have a captive audience.
Weiss: *shocked gasp and hurries to her feet, grabbing Jaune's hand in both of hers*
Yang: *helps Jaune to his feet*
Jaune: Perhaps a bench.
* * *
Jaune sat on the ground in one of Mistral's parks, with Weiss and Yang kneeling across from him.
Weiss: *breathes deep*
Weiss: How long have you been planning this!
Weiss: *breathes deep*
Weiss: I apologize. We have barely been in Mistral for a couple months, you perhaps one month more.
Jaune: Um... plan?..
Yang: That does sound more like Jaune.
Weiss: But! *stares at her ring*
Yang: *waves her hand in front of Weiss' face*
Weiss: I apologize.
Yang: You are both so beautiful, but try to pay attention.
Weiss: But look at the delicate filigree!
Jaune: You do know... that I didn't... actually make them...
Weiss: But they are so beautiful.
Yang (looking at her ring): They are...
Jaune: So... I saw where this was going, walked by a jewelry store, walked in, and started talking to the jeweller.
Weiss: And you did not think ahead?.. you did not plan this out?
Weiss: *breathes deep*
Weiss: You didn't, did you?
Jaune: *awkward smile*
Yang: He just saw what he wanted, and took it.
Jaune: *rocks his head back and forth*
Jaune: Well... yeah... As a reward for helping to save his nephew at Haven, and... I think... because of how much I loved you... he did it for free. In his spare time... which is why it took so long.
Weiss: So long?! However long did it take?
Jaune: *shrugs*
Jaune: Like... a month?..
Yang: So... like... the day after... we...
Jaune: Two.
Weiss: Two days!
Jaune: Um... well... we were already together... and we agreed... to keep... Yang...
Jaune: *looks at Yang*
Jaune: And Yang acted like her life depended on it.
Yang: Okay, true.
Weiss: *reaches out to grab Yang's hand*
Weiss: We could not let Yang go back to how she was... She was part of us, from the first day.
Yang: I'm so relieved to hear you say that.
Weiss (looking at her ring): Now that we have been so indelibly marked, we can never return to the way we were... and I could not be more overjoyed.
Yang: What she said, but with more growling. But, we agreed that we can't all get married, right?
Weiss: You will be the wife, I will be the lovingly kept mistress. You will have your reassurances... I will get my revenge against Father...
Yang: And Jaune will get his sexpets.
Weiss: Perhaps not the language I would have chosen... but yes...
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anabe23bookwormstuff · 5 years ago
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Trial  Chapter 15
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Almost a month had gone by since Ben had left, Rey was almost sure that he was done with the camps and that she was safe, so he could come back but... this time it was him who wasn't safe.
Rey  had went to Naboo and back a million times already, or that was what she felt like.
The senators, kings and queens decided that it was a good place to gather and almost everyday they'll have meetings with Rey, trying to convince her to rule the galaxy, giving her advice, telling her what they needed from her and every day she felt worst and worst, with a big burden on her shoulders.
"You've already saved the galaxy, you can sure rule it" Ben had said to her the other night, while she complained about not being fit for the job.
Ben...
She still couldn't convince them to not put Ben to trial, and it scared her to death. What if all that was left was for her and Ben was to only see each other in secret, through their force bonds? only for minutes but not able to spend time together... or walk hand in hand... or talk for more than some minutes...
They wanted to negociate with her, and she had that to discuss too.
"Rey! look at this, John and I did it" Leda came running to where Rey was sitting near the  fire. A young boy followed Leda and gave Rey a shy smile.
"Wow, this is amazing kids. Who taught you?" Rey admired the little drone standing between them, it's body was like a box and it had two wheels, it didn't do much but it was pretty.
"Kaydel helped us a little" John said.
"She taught you well, in no time you'll be able to build bigger droids or ships, or anything" she encouraged the kids.
"Thanks Rey" Leda said and hugged her. It always took Rey by surprise when the kid hugged her,  but she did it almost every day. She smiled warmly and pathed her back.
"If I don't have to go tomorrow then I'll help you get some parts to improve the droid okay?"
"Great!" the kids ran away with the drone following behind and Rey sighed.
"Oh no, go away" If Rey was mad with Poe before, she was even more now, that almost every time he got near her was to tell her about meetings she had to attend to.
"I can't keep apologyzing forever Rey" he said raising his hands and slowly sitting beside her.
"What now?" she hugged herself  and turned just enough to see Poe.
"Ben said he'll come back soon, he has visited all the camps" Poe was playing with his hands.
"When did he tell you that? are you serious? Oh god... but... didn't he requested another ship to take some kids here just two days ago?"
"He sent a message earlier, saying that the ship from the other day would come back before him, full of kids and that today he'll make an effort to come back."
Why hadn't he told Rey anything about that?...
"In that case that is fantastic, one of the few good things you have said to me" She aswered and turned her back.
"Rey..." Poe's voice was pleading behind her.
"Come on, I miss my friend" he  said. Rey rested her chin on her knees. A friend... she hadn't had many friends before she joined the resistance.
She had to be very careful who she talked to, who saw her, what she found... she had been so alone for such a long time.
"I'm sorry" she said after a while.
"And why are you sorry? I'm the one who's sorry" Poe said.
"I got mad at you for too long... and you've apologized enough" she said turning to him.
"I guess I'll be mad if you've done the same too." He admited making them both laugh.
"Come on, dinners on me" He said standing up and offering his hand, Rey stood up alone and rolled her eyes, but she laughed and walked with him.
The next day a ship  full of kids arrived on the base just as Ben had promised, and Rey had to go to Naboo, just as expected.
For some reason they had requested for her to stay  for three days this time.
She wondered if maybe when she got back to the camp Ben would be here.
Meanwhile Finn, Poe, D-O and BB-8 joined her on her trip to Naboo, on their way to the palace she catched a glimpse of the lake house and closed her eyes, remembring how good she had felt the last time she was there.
It felt like years ago, when in fact there had  been only months.
"I'm going to accept, on one condition"  Rey said causing everyone to get excited.
"And what would that  be?" Queen Zorya questioned. All the  eyes were on Rey.
She closed her right hand into a fist and stood up, holding it behind her back and then placing both hands on the table, taking a moment to look at everyone while she spoke.
"I've come everytime you've requested me, I have waited and learned, patiently hearing all your ideas and plans, and... I will accept to rule, for a year or two at least IF Ben Solo is forgiven and not judged" she sentenced.
Her words made some people mad, and soon the comments clashed with each other filling the room with noise.
"Silence!" A king from one of the outher rim planets demanded.
"Shall we vote on this? I belive that Rey's words are true... and that she wil continue to listen to us while we rule... so we can all consider what she's asking for us" Queen Zorya said.
"Almost all of you have accepted former troopers to join your societies, some of you didn't even judge them, and those people are the same. Ben... he's not Kylo Ren, all I'm asking for... is a chance for him to proove it, to live. Because if you judge him... you won't have mercy, and I know it, and you'll lose me as a ruler." She declared. She was leaning a little too much on the fact that they wanted her to rule and hoped that they wouldn't just give up on her and search for him.
"Give us some time to deliver, then we'll vote. And you have to sign, that in case that we go with your petition you'll rule, following our... suggestions." One of the senators said.
Rey was too excited to even think of his words, she only thought about the fact  that they'll probably aprove it.
"I'll do it" she said.
"Someone will go and look for you when we're ready" he said, and Finn, Rey and Poe went outside.
"I... don't feel like they have such good intentions Rey, no offense but, don't you think it's weird that they insist so much in you ruling?" Finn said.
"I think they just know how powerful she is" Poe shrugged. Politics were not his thing.
"Or they're trying to use you" he said.
"How would they use me?" Rey asked.
"I don't know, your image? I bet there's no one in the galaxy who doesn't know who you are"
"As long as they actually plan on doing something good for the galaxy... I guess it's fine" she shrugged. Politics weren't her thing either.
Finn sighed.
"I don't know... I think there's something else going on. You shouldn't just accept like that."
"It's not forever and... it may spare Ben" she let out a deep breath she was holding.
"You... don't even want to do this Rey" Finn said and stopped walking. Rey stopped too and stood with her hands on her hips, Poe being the last one to realize what was going on.
"I don't... but I want to help Ben, and I do want to help the people... maybe having their help won't be so bad." she said but she knew it wouldn't be enough for him.
"When did all your decisition started being all about Ben?" he complained.
"I mean, really, don't get me wrong I kind of like the guy now but... he's only brought problems Rey... even before he was Ben Solo" the way he said Ben's name, like mocking him made Rey angry and for a second her hand went to the hilt of her saber.
"Okay, stop. Come on, you're all probably hungry. Why don't we all go for breakfast and wait for their decisition... we can talk and relax" Poe said standing between them.
Rey was going to argue that Finn was the one trying to fight and asking for problems when she felt a familiar warmth in her heart, all her senses shouted her to look around and a grin spread through her face.
"He's here" she  said.  The boys didn't understand riht away what she was talking about and it was only after a ship was near them and landed that they  got it.
"Rey!" Finn called for her when she ran away.
"Just let her be" Poe said putting his arm around his shoulders.
"Rey" Ben greeted her getting out, noticing her standing in the distance.
In a second she was hugging him tight.
"Hi" she said and her voice was a little muffled by his shirt.
"Hey" he answered hugging her tighter and lifting her up for a second.
Her happiness didn't last long because she qickly realized that he was in danger.
"Ben as much as I like that you're here, you should go back to the base. They're deciding if they are or not going to put you on trial" she said taking his arms and looking him in the eyes.
"It's okay, for what you've told me I don't think they'll do anything to upset you. They're set on you ruling" he said rubbing her shoulders and then sliding his hands all the way down to her hands.
"I've missed you" he said. Rey grinned, maybe he was right and maybe they were going to make this small sacrifice for her.
"After they vote we could go to the lake house if you want" she offered.
"It may be good for a day or two" he agreed with a little side smile.
They were walking towards Finn and Poe when they heard the steps of many people walking towards them.
"What the hell?" Rey murmured and in a second she and Ben positioned back to back, their sabers in hand ready  to take whatever was coming.
"Hands up, Ben Solo! you must surrender and come with us" A man said, the leader. They were all soldiers coming ot of the palace. Soon they were all around them, and Rey  heard Poe calling out for them.
"Don't come near, the senators, kings and queens said they'll discuss it and vote, adn they'll get back to me!" Rey warned.
"The desition has been made, and the answer is no. Now! take the prisoner!" the man ordered and the soldier walker closer to them.
Rey spoon her saber on her hand, ready to fight the soldiers when suddenly Ben stood in front her.
"What are yo doing?!"
"This won't help. Rey, it's better if I go with them" He had already put his saber away.
"What are you talking about? no!" she  didn't pt the saber away and shook Ben's arm with her free hand, trying to push the soldiers away with the force.
"Rey. Stop" he whispered.
"But-" she didn't understand... this-  he- had they set her a trap? But how could they know that Ben was coming?.
"Hands up!" Someone yelled pushing Ben to kneel.
He did as they said and Rey complained, shouting threaths here and there.
"It's okay. It's okay Rey" Ben said to her again and again.
"Don't you dare touch him!" she followed the soldier as they took Ben inside the palace.
"Stop there" other guards told her and blocked her way. She was mad and confused, and didn't even think about convincing them to move away.
Instead she made a quick desition and headed to the room she was before, and where the traitors across the galazy were probably sitting right now.
"You lied to me!" she yelled, storming into the room and kicking the doors open.
"Why?!" this question was followed by the yellow light of her saber.
"Rey, we had to do it. The votes for no won, and with the word that he was already here. We couldn't let the opportunity pass." A man said.
Queen Zorya avoided to look at her, in shame, because she had voted for Ben to be forgiven and had lost, and couldn't do anything when the soldiers went after him.
"Release him. I swear I won't rule or do anything unless you let him go!"
"Oh, but Rey. You will rule anyways" another man said.
"I won't, I won't and you can't make me. You've never answered me why you need me so bad, but soon you won't have me at all!"
"Do you want to go on trial too Rey?"
"What? for what?!" she  kept pointing her saber at many people in the room, not being able to choose just one person to attack.
"We know you're a palpatine. Do you think anyone, and I mean anyone would want you alive after they know that?"
(Yeah, I know. Hate the Palpatine desition and I'm going to change it in the other book but, for know, she's a Palpatine guys.)
"So what? It's just a name, that I've never taken."
"It doesn't matter if you've taken it or not, it is enough for people to hate you"
"Well and then what? I don't think you'll do thata fter you've put so much effort on convincing me to rule." she wouldn't give up.
"The consequences this could have would be even worst than whatever happens to Ren" the man from earlier said, and Rey imagined herself slicing him with her saber for a minute. She hated being threatened, she hated being lied to and she hated the fact that he called Ben, Ren.
"Then put me to trial, I don't care. Come on!"
"Guards!" a woman yelled and they came running and tackling Rey on the ground. They tied her hand behind her back and made her stand up. They were all pointing blasters at her and someone gagged her.
"Keep and eye on her always, and I mean always, also don't let her talk, or she'll convince you to let her go" After that they all retired and queen Zorya gave her a last regretful look.
This was the worst time for the queen to be a pacifist.
Rey supposed that Finn and Poe had also been stopped and locked away somewhere as they never went to get her, and hours had passed with the soldier surrounding her.
Then a man came and let the guards know that it was time to take her outside.
She stomped on the guards feet as much as she could all the way out and thought of a million ways to get rid of them, taking Ben and leaving.
She noticed the improviced makeshift stage and the crowd around it. Some guards pointed at Ben, who was kneeled and with his hands on his back as the  people yelled at him. The kings, queens and senators were on a line in front of all the people.
The man who called him Ren climbed up and talked loud to be heard, and Rey noticed that someone was recording him, probably to show this to the rest of the galaxy.
Rey kicked a few guards when she  noticed that one had pushed Ben to the ground and pressed against his back with his boot.
But they restrained her again and dragged her closer to the stage.
"Everyone who has traveled across the galaxy to come here and testify justice, please be welcome." Some people chanted. "We're here to judge Kylo  Ren for his actions as former Supreme Leader and his service to the First Order and Palpatine!" The crowd really went loud when he mentioned the name Palpatine and Rey swallowed hard, suddenly scared of what people would do to her if they found out.
"Kill him!" she heard some of the people scream.
"Stop!"  she tried yelling but the gag on her mouth wouldn't let her talk.
The guards lift him off the ground abruptly, and carelessly plling his hair. Ben tried not to react at all to not give them any more satisfaction.
"Sorry" he tried saying to Rey, more like whispering to her, in hopes that maybe he could get them straight to her mind.
He didn't actually planned for things to go like that or end up like this. He had thought about letting them to put him on trial, as he went base to base searching for whoever wanted to harm Rey, but he never imagined that they'll get him so easy.
He had seen earlier how they dragged Rey out and wished with all his heart that she didn't have to witness whatever they planned on doing to him.
He could almost hear her complaining again, why wasn't he fighting back? when they could easy kill all the guards. It was  a fact, but if they did... no one in the galaxy would look at them the same, or at least Rey and they'll never be in peace.
"We have voted and found him guilty on all the crimes mentioned before" Ben came back to reality and payed attention to what the man directing the "trial" was saying.
"Kill! kill! kill!" the crowd said again and again. Wasn't people in Naboo supossed to be smart and peaceful? he silently complained.
Then he looked around and noticed that the queen wasn't with everyone else, and remembered that many people had come just to see how he would end.
"Silence, silence everyone. It would only be fit, for Kylo Ren to pay for his crimes, with his life. And what would be more ironic than using his own weapon?!" the people cheared and a guard gave him Ben's saber.
"It's going to be too easy!" A man on the crowd yelled.
"No, no. Nothing like that, our guard will take his time injuring Kylo Ren, until we give him the final blow and cut his head off!" he screamed joining the crowd's euphoria.
To this Rey's heart altered, beating faster and feeling like every part of her body brned with anger. Once agan she kicked many guards off her and try running away just be caught again.
"Now, we begin!" The man said turning on Ben's saber and walking towards him.
Rey shook and grunted rying to get off, as Ben fought not to close his eyes and stay put as the man approached him.
Without words he slid the saber lightly against Ben's leg. He was serious when he said he would take his time torturing him until he killed him.
On the third cut Rey had had enough and maybe no one noticed but the sky started turning grey, darkening, forming the storm that'll give Rey the lightning she calling for.
Ben was sweating and had finally let a grunt out when the saber went trough the soft skin neck, very softly.
his head fell forward and a guard lift it up by his hair.
"Stop!!!" Rey had managed to take the gag off, slightly and in that moment she made a fist and lightning stroke all the guards around her.
"Ben!"
she called out running and somehow keeping her balance with her hands tied behind her.
"Rey! wait" Queen Zorya came out of somewhere, with a knife on her hand and Rey was ready to shoot more lightings at her.
"I'm going to help!" the queen said putting her hands up and alternating her gaze between her and Ben.
She approached Rey and cut the ties with the knife.
"I have a plan, but don't use your powers anymore"
"I'll decide that when I know about your plan!" she spat at her.
The queen made a signal to someone and soon many guards made a barrier between the crowd and the stage, and the other kings and queens and the stage. The man torturing Ben was so focused on his pain that he didn't notice until queen Zorya got up and shouted.
"Now!"
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thetalesfromtheunderworld · 5 years ago
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CHAPTER 1: THE PROLOGUE.
I always thought I had a good relationship with  Fates. They have always been somewhat kind to me. My life, one might say, is not of an avarage one. But for me, it’s quite normal and with all honesty sometimes tremendously boring. I lived in a castle uppon the Moon Hill, where the last rays of day fell and my Mother – Nyx- began her rule. She was one of the most beautiful beings that had ever been created by Kronos. With milky-white skin, long and dark as ink hair and eyes that reflected the rays of stars she put up to the sky at every sunset. My Father – Hypnos, stole her from the dephs of Tartarus and for that, he was severely punished. Even though he remained a beautiful being, he never spoke a word. Only in their sleep, one might find him, wondering the ups and lows of dreams. And there’s me, Thanatos. As a part of my Father’s punishment for snatching my Mother from Tartarus, I was obliged to live in the Underworld until I came of age. My duties were to keep the souls peaceful and calm, even when they were desperate to escape their doom.
One day, I was feeling particularly moody. I never liked that place and the thought of having to live here for the next three years made my skin prickle with anxiety. The only thing that made my day more bright, was meeting my best friend – Melinoe. Concidering where she was living, she was one of the most joyful beings I have ever encountered in my life. And maybe that’s why I liked her so much.
I remember when I first came to the Underworld. It was a scary and unfriendly place, full of souls and faul creatures who guarded the pits and gauges in which a slimy substance was bubbling. At the main entrance stood Charon, the Soul Carrier. He was very tall, skinny, hooded and cloaked. His skin was wrinkled and stained. He turned his faceless hood my way and said: ‘ Ah, young master Thanatos. Lord Hades and Lady Persephone are awaiting your arrival.’
He stretched out his hand and pointed to a very shabby-looking boat at the the banks of Styx. I slowly went up to it and got in. It wobbled, when the hooded man had entered and a few moments later, we were crossing the River. I looked around carefully. The view awed me so much, I barely could blink. Solid rocks formed tunnels that led towards a castle on top of a hill. My uncle’s home. Although Hades was not very closely related to me, I have gained some of his traits. The Soul Carrier stopped the boat and said: „We are here.”
I got off at the shore and gave him two golden drachmas, which were customary to give as a totem to the Carrier. He snatched them and hid underneath many layers of his coat. He bowed with respect and got back to his duties. I stood for a moment and stared and the castle that towered over the hill.
Beneath it, there was a road leading to the tall gates made of burned ebony bones. On top of the entrance there was a sign: „ There is no other certainty than death”.
‘Yeah, you can say that again...’ I murmured to myself as I crossed the first gate and entered a wide courtyard. I saw some creatures wondering here and there like shadows. I did not fear them, but I felt I slightly uncomfortable around them. There was tall door in front of me now. I looked up and saw sculls and crossbones ornamented from top to bottom. I reached for the door knocker but they suddenly opened on their own accord. I walked inside slowly. It felt like I’ve entered a grave. I went up a long corridor and stopped at the entrance to, what I supposed, was the Audience Hall. There were two guards on each side of it. Tall, dressed in black and dark blue armours. The lights were also in those colours here which felt like the whole place was blues, grays and blacks. The door opened and I stepped inside. The Hall was quite impressive. Tall ceilings, supported by carved columns. A blue and black carpet that led towards a place where two thrones were placed. But those weren’t thrones you’d expect in an Audiance Hall. No. They were made of skelletons and skulls. Both tall, pale white just like the figures which sat in them, though their faces were covered by skull masks. The taller figure had stag like horns placed upon their head and around them there were black diamonds and saphires. The antlers were curved a bit at the end and were gleaming like they’d been covered with wax. His robes were long and exquisit, also black, blue and gray with a tall collar, that nearly reached the antlers on his head. Next to that figure, stood a shorter one. Also dressed in the most exquisit dress I have ever seen. It looked as if someone had taken down the nightsky and sew this beautiful outfit. Her face was covered by the same skull mask as her partner’s but I knew, who she was. It was Persephone. The goddess of Spring. Beautiful as she can be, but there was something vile in her posture right now. She had a long spear in her hand, ended with a black diamond as big as a child’s head. I looked at the man at her side, who came down from the platform and swiped his mask off his face, showing a stunning man. His angular jawline and high cheekbones made him look nobel and raw. His eyes were almond-shaped in colours of dark blue and black. His face showed no emotion. And , I dare say, he was the most intimidating person I have ever met in my life. I took a step back and kneeled.
‘ My Lord. My name is Thanatos.’ I said in a low voice. Hades smirked at me and bowed back.
‘ I greet you in my kingdom, Lord of Good Death’ he said in a mocking tone. ‘ I hear you are as skilled as your Father in sleep magic, am I right?’
‘ I do not use the sleep magic, My Lord. That’s the treat of my Father. I ease the pain of passing for all those who come to your kingdom.’ I aswered, looking straight into his eyes. His face was still but I found some sort of amusement in it.
‘Ah, you ease the pain of passing. Well, then I will have a perfect spot for you, My young Lord.’ he answered, turning his back to me. He stood by his queen.
‘You will be sent to Tartarus, where your skills will be most useful. There is, indeed, a lot of pain there that deserves to be taken away.’ he added. Persephone turned her head to him and swiped off her skull mask.
‘ How can you send a child to Tartarus? He does not deserve to be punished that severely.’ she said. Hades looked at his Queen and his face was like stone.
‘ This is no child, my Queen. This is a gift from his parents. His skills will surely be far more useful here than in the mortal realm. And he will not go alone.’
With that said, he snapped his fingers and right next to him a figure emerged from the mist. Few moments later a beautiful girl appeared in the place of the figure. She was tall, with pale face and bright, star-like eyes. She wore a long, dark dress and had a crown of black thorns on her head.
‘Melionoe. My beloved child. Come. I want you to meet your new apprentice. This is Thanatos, son of Nyx.’ he said, pointing to me. I bowed in respect. ‘ My lady.’
‘It is a pleasure to meet you, Thanatos. Come. Let’s not waste time’ she said and she took me under her wing. Taught me all what I needed to know about Tartarus and from that day forth, she became my friend.
I was sitting at the bank of the River and looking at the new flow of souls. It always smelled the same. With rot, fear and blood. I didn’t mind the smell. At this point, I didn’t mind anything. Days turned to months, months to years. I didn’t even know, if my duty was over or not. My mind went blank and I didn’t want to talk to anyone. Not even to Melionoe.
‘ Always the grumpy one, ey, Theo?’ she said with her joyful voice, dropping to sit right next me. For as long as I remembered, I have never seen her sad or dull. Which was quite unusal.
‘ You’re cheerful for the both of us, Mel.’ I answered and picked up a stone from the ground. I had the urge to just toss it into the slimy water of Acheront, but it would most definitley fly right back at me and knock me out.
‘Ah, come on, Theo. Don’t be so grumpy. Life in this place is already dull, don’t make it worse.’ she added, poking me with her shoulder. ‘ I have something fun for you. Come on’ she said and took off to the nearest boat. I went after her, not really understanding what she was trying to do. Mel sailed onto the River and set the course to Hades. I began to wonder if this was a good idea to begin with. But I trusted her more than I trusted myself and I knew that she would never do anything that would  angry her Father. Melionoe, you see, was very fond of Hades. Even though, he never showed that he cared for her and left her in charge of the worst part of his kingdom, she always was loyal. We were passing another turn, when I saw Cerberus running straight towards us.
‘ Bad dog! Sit!’ Mel shouted and the dog stopped at the bank of the River and growled with disapproval. ‘ Go find astray souls, you dumb dog’ she added, when the animal disappeared from sight. Finally we stopped at one of the entrance gates to Hades. I looked at her,frowning.
‘You once told me, your only dream was to leave this place and have a chance to live a normal life. So I’m giving you a chance to do so.’ she said with a smile.
‘What?’
‘ I said, I want to give you a chance to live among mortals. I will give you a month among them. If it won’t be, what you desire, you will come back and stay in Tartarus with me.  If you manage to find your goal in life among the mortals, I will grant you the freedom you so desire.’ she answered more seriously. I only once saw her make that face and it was when she disappointed her Father.
‘ But… Why are you doing this, Mel? Why you want to break your Father’s order?’ I asked, taken aback by this claim. She was willing to risk everything to make my dream come true.
‘ Because you are my best friend. And the one I have loved dearly for many years. Since you came to Tartarus, my life became happier. So I want to grant you this choice. Find your goal among mortals and if you won’t succeed, come back to me.’ she said, coming closer to me. She rose my chin and kissed me. And then, the gates of Hades disappeared…
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flowerpowell · 6 years ago
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Second Chances (Drake x MC / Liam x MC)
Part Seven
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I’m sorry it took me so long to post this part! I was super busy with everything and I didn��t have time or inspiration to write at all. There’s only (most likely) one chapter left so I hope it’ll take me less time than this one. I hope you’ll like it and as always, feedback is very appreciated!!
All rights go to Pixelberry.
Rating: PG-16 (metions of gun violence, blood etc)
Word count: 2612
Tagging: @brightpinkpeppercorn @speedyoperarascalparty @agent-bossypants @museofbooks @jyreusser85 @journeytohomesworld @walkerismychoice @walkerduchess @confessionsofabrokegirl @catlady0911 @furiousherringoperatortoad @littlegreenmoo @mysteli @butindeed @gardeningourmet @hopefulmoonobject @sleepwalkingelite @eileendannie @beautifulobsessionforpink @bobasheebaby @fluffy-marshmallow-heart @boneandfur @damienswhore @mynameiskaylabella @delightfullypinkglitter @mr-sinclaire @topsyturvy-dream @blackcatkita @damiensmatch @whatmcsaid @sstee1 @mrsernestsinclaire @lordberg @barbaravalentino @itstaygs @umccall71 @wannabemc2 @mrsdrakewalkerblog @marywrites-things @moneyfordiamonds @annekebbphotography @zaffrenotes @hrhdes @tacohead13 @ao719 @dancetothestoriesinyoursoul  @jlouise88 ♥
PLEASE READ BEFORE:
Tumblr tag notifications suck. I don’t get some and I know some people don’t get mine. That’s why, please make sure you read previous part before (you can find it HERE) as this chapter probably won’t make any sense without reading the previous one. ALSO, I’m gonna tag both, here and in the comments, just in case, so forgive me if you’ll get more notications. 
Three hours after Riley arrived in Valtoria, she was still in her bed trying to rethink everything that happened within the last 24 hours. I don’t remember. He asked me for one day, but his plan failed. I still can’t rememeber. It’s not my fault. I don’t remember being in love with Drake. So why does it hurt so much?
Riley turned again in her bed. She had been trying to fall asleep for hours, futilely. Her mind wandered back to Drake; their little tour, his laugh, the way he looked at her. UGH! What is wrong with me?? I like Drake but I don’t have any romantic feelings for him... right?
She turned again...and again and again. Nothing helped. Her heart was beating too fast at the thought of Drake’s face when she told him she didn’t remember. She had never seen a face which looked sadder than that, so disappointed, so lost. He didn’t even try to argue, she saw him swallowing hard and forcing a smile on his face. And then he wished her happiness and disappeared before she could say or do anything else.
But even if...what was she supposed to do? She can’t force herself to love him, she can’t force her feelings. This is a mess.
~~~~
Liam was woken up by insistent knocking on the door. Barely registering it was 7 in the morning, and cursing quietly as it was the only day he was able to sleep in, he opened the door. Drake was the last person he expected to see but yet...here he was, looking like a mess.
Despite their argument earlier, Liam still cared for his best friend and seeing him like this made him regret everything he said. “Come in,” he opened the door a little bit wider and Drake entered the room. For a few moments they both stood there silently, not sure what to say. After a while, Drake broke the silence. “I’m leaving Cordonia today. I thought I’d tell you in person.”
Liam looked at his friend, shocked by his statement. “What? Why?”
“There’s nothing holding me here Liam. I’m going to my mom, I miss her.”
“What about...Riley? I know you two met yesterday, why are you leaving her? I thought...you were engaged, I thought you wanted to fight for her?” Liam said carefully and Drake looked at him. “She still doesn’t remember me. I...took a chance but failed. She’s not in love with me and I can’t make her. I just want her to be truly happy and no matter how painful it may get, I know you’d make her very happy.”
Liam shook his head at Drake’s words, “Drake, I was out of line, I didn’t mean what I said--”
“What you said was true,” Drake interrupted him, “You were right. I didn’t fight for her, instead, I blamed everyone else for everything. Of course, I didn’t like the fact you wanted to take advantage of her memory loss but I understand. And...I thought I could make her remember again, I really, really, thought so. But she still doesn’t. And maybe...maybe in some weird way, we were never meant to be together. Maybe it was always you two. And I want to give you my blessing. Not that you needed it. I-I’ll never stop loving her but it was always about her happiness.”
“No, Drake, wait, I am sorry. I-I am not going to lie, I did care for her deeply, I still do. It doesn’t go away like this. But I don’t want you to leave just because of me, I’m sure there’s a way to--”
“Liam,” Drake stopped him again, “I made my decision, okay? I can’t bear seeing you two, seeing her being in love with you, especially now that I know what it feels like to be with her. I just can’t. I’ve suffered enough.”
Liam took a deep breath before clearing his throat. How the hell did this happen? This is such a mess. “Will you be at the party tonight? So we can at least say goodbye to you?” he asked carefully. Drake shook his head. “No. I need to pack. I’ll catch the earliest flight I can get.”
“But...shouldn’t you at least talk with Riley? Drake!” he exclaimed when Drake started leaving the room and heading towards the stairs. “Drake! You can’t leave like this!”
Drake stopped for a second, turned to his friend and smiled sadly.“Take care of her, brother.”
~~~~
Liam didn’t know what to think. On the one hand, he got his friend’s permission so everything should be fine. On the other, he felt awful. Even if this whole situation wasn’t his fault, he still felt somewhat guilty for what happened.
As soon as Drake left, Liam ordered a car to get him to Valtoria. He needed to talk with Riley. He believed it was her decision to be made and whatever it could be, he’d accept it.
When he arrived he spotted Gladys, talking with someone on the phone. He waved at her but she was too busy to notice. Shrugging, he entered the ballroom, still in the process of decorating, and headed to the Riley’s room.
“Liam! What are you doing here?” He heard a familiar voice from behind him. No, please no. Not now, please n--
“Buddy! Are here to help us with the preparations?” Maxwell was as cheerful as always. Liam forced a smile and turned to face his friend. “Maxwell! I didn’t expect you here!”
“Well I came here to check on Riley and help with the party. And you?” Maxwell eyed Liam suspiciously.
“I came to talk with Riley. Drake and I talked in the morning and I wanted to clarify a few things with her,” Liam aswered, suddenly feeling embarassed. What is wrong with me, I have every right to be here.
“Now?”
“Now. Why not?” He asked more confidently. Maxwell sighed. “Listen, she is not in the best place right now. Whatever you’re about to say has to wait.”
“Maxwell,” Liam started, his voice firm and Maxwell realized his friend was angry, “no offence, but I know what I need to do and I don’t need your advice. Drake is leaving and I must know if--”
“If she still loves you so can be with her completely denying the fact that she’s still confused?”
“Why are you so against me, huh? Drake gave me a green light, Riley has feelings for me, so what’s your problem?” Liam hissed.
“I don’t have a problem! I dunno...I think it’s unfair to meddle even more. And knowing what you want to tell her, I’m sure it’ll only confuse her more. Give her a moment to think buddy, so she can figure out her feelings herself.” Maxwell put a hand on Liam’s shoulder but he quickly brushed it off. “You just don’t want me to be happy with her, do you? You want her to be with Drake, just tell me, okay? Stop pretending you’re my friend when you’re clearly trying to keep me away from this.”
“You still don’t understand, do you?” Maxwell shook his head. “It wasn’t only about Riley and Drake, it was mainly about you.”
“No, I don’t think I understand.”
Maxwell sighed. “Liam, you’re after a woman who chose someone else before you. She could have had you but she didn’t pick you in the end. And I’m not trying to be rude, but if she didn’t choose you, it means you weren’t the one. And if you weren’t the one then, chances are, you’re not the one now either.”
“What are you trying to say?” Liam hissed gritting his teeth.
“Don’t you want to be with someone who chooses you? Only you? Who would always choose you? I understand you love Riley, or rather, the idea of Riley, but you weren’t her first choice. And you deserve to be someone’s first choice. Not someone who wants you only when she loses her memory, with all the respect to Riley.”
Liam rubbed his temples. All this only gave him a headache, even though deep inside he knew Maxwell was surprisingly right.  Maxwell patted him on the shoulders. “You’ll find someone buddy. But Riley is not the one for you.” He stood up and looked at his friend. “I’ll leave you now to think but we’ll see each other at the party tonight, right?”
“Right, right,” Liam murmured, still not looking up. Maxwell went to the ballroom and Liam was left alone with his thoughts. And he had a lot to process.
~~~~
Riley didn’t feel like partying. All she wanted to do was lying in her bed and doing nothing. She didn’t want this party in the first place but when Maxwell told her Drake wasn’t going to be there, she didn’t want to come either. But she had to, it was her party after all. Reluctantly, she put on a dress, plastered a smile and got out of her room for the first time that day. Gladys greeted her cheerfully but she ignored her. I’ll be here for an hour or two and then I’ll excuse myself. Hopefully nobody would mind, she kept repeating to herself.
Even though there wasn’t many guests, Liam already took care of minimalizing their number, she still felt like it was too much. Like she couldn’t breathe.
“Riley! How are you, you poor thing? I heard about the accident but I was never informed how bad it was. I’m glad to see you looking so good!” A woman in a dark blue dress exclaimed. “Oui, c’etait vraiment worrying, the accident, I’m glad you’re okay,” another one said. Okay, so that Penelope and Kiara...right? Hmm, I didn’t know we were friends though. “Yes, I’m much better. Thank you for your concerns,” Riley replied.
“You know, if you ever feel bad or something, I really recommend getting a poodle, these dogs can help a lot with--”
“Excuse me ladies, may I steal lady Riley for a moment?” Liam cut in and Riley smiled gratefully. She didn’t remember everything but from the bits and pieces she did, she definitely could recall Penelope’s obsession with poodles.
“Of course King Liam,” Penelope answered and bowed slightly. “Riley, is Drake going to be here tonight aussi? I can’t find him anywhere,” Kiara asked and Riley glared at her. Why is she asking about Drake? Why would she need him here? What--
“He is not. He wasn’t feeling too well,” Liam answered studying Riley’s  face. “Oh,” Kiara’s face fell a little, “well then, I hope he gets well soon.”
After both ladies left, Liam and Riley stood in silence. Finally, he broke the silence. “How are you Riley? I heard Drake was leaving and I was concerned about you.”
“I’m fine....No, not really. Not yet. But I will be,” she answered honestly. What was the point of lying anyway?
“Do you...regret not being with Drake? Not remembering?” he asked carefully, suddently afraid of the answer. But he needed to know. In response, she sighed deeply. “I do and I don’t. I regret hurting him. I know he says I didn’t hurt him but I’m not blind, I see it in his eyes. I hurt him. But I don’t think I could be with him. Not now. I remember more but that’s still not it. I’m more confused than ever, Liam. My memories are a mess right now and I just wish someone or something could clear this up.”
Liam listened to her, a million thoughts running through his mind. “Did something change?” he asked, so quietly that Riley barely heard him. He was dreading the answer, worried it would only confirm what Maxwell said.
“Everything. Nothing. I don’t know,” she shrugged. Liam clearned his throat. It was now or never. “Have your feelings towards me changed? Are you still...in love with me?”
“I...don’t know. They didn’t disappear, if that’s what you’re asking. I still remember being in love with you and all, but my resonable self is questioning everything. And as much as I want to just jump into your arms and ask you to take me away from everything I need to listen to my brain and think.”
Liam smiled slighly. “So, it’s not a lost case?” Riley returned the smile. “Nope. But you need to give me time to think. Maybe with Drake leaving I’ll have a better chance to--”
“Drake!”
Riley turned and saw Maxwell hugging Drake. What was he doing here?
“What are you doing here buddy, I thought you were leaving?” Maxwell was reading her mind. Drake shook his head, his eyes focused on Riley. “I need to talk to Riley before I leave.”
She swallowed hard when Drake approached them. He nodded at Liam who studied his and Riley’s faces. “Drake...” she rasped not sure what she was supposed to do. Hug him? Shake hands? Stand like an idiot?
“Brooks, I...I didn’t want to come but I felt like I needed to say goodbye to you personally.”
“Drake, you don’t have to leave, you--”
“Please, Riley. Let me finish,” he took a deep breath. “I don’t want to get in the way of your happiness. I don’t want you to feel you owe me something. That you need to be with me just because we were together before. Your happiness matters the most. And I respect that. Just do whatever you feel like doing. Life is too short for anything else. And know that you’ll always have friend in me. I love you and that’s why I want you to move on.”
“Drake, I--”
“AHHHHHH!!!”
She was interruped by a scream and before she could register what happened, the lights went out.
“Oh no,” she heard Drake saying, “Brooks where are you?”
“Guards! Guards! What’s happening?” Liam asked. She could hear panicked voices of Hana, Penelope, some heavy footsteps, sounds of people fighting when suddently it was light again.
And then she saw it.
A man with glasses stood right in front of her, aiming his gun at her. Some other masked men were occupied with other people, Liam was trying to fight another assassin and Gladys smirked at Riley from the corner of the room. She was a part of it, she’s one of them. Even though, she didn’t rememeber it clearly, Riley could swear something similar happened before.
“We meet again lady Riley,” the man said. “Did you miss your favorite press secretary?”
Who the hell he is? Why am I friends with assassins? Why was an assassin my press secretary? Riley tried to remember anything but her mind was blank. Before she had a chance to reply, the man spoke again.
“I’m only sorry it will the last time.”
And without further ado, he pulled the trigger. Riley registered everything in slow motion. Liam’s scream. Bastien and Mara running up to catch the man with glasses. She was paralyzed with fear, too scared to move as she observed the bullet coming right at her. And it would hit her if it wasn’t for Drake who slipped between her and the bullet last moment. The hit was so strong that both of them fell on the floor. “Drake!!” She looked at Drake, lying motionless on her, big blood stain on his shirt. The room started getting darker and darker and she kept screaming his name until the darkness took her too.
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we-were-legends · 6 years ago
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“Champion’s dawn”
Chapter 41 - “A foretaste”
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Oropher was impossibly satisfied with the work his youngest soldiers did. They took to heart what he said and they did only what they were able to, but with the help of Alagos they managed to do even more complicated orders that required a lot of walking, talking and patience, but thanks to this Oropher's pile of papers lowered more than a half.
While he was doing all the backlogs with papers and Alagos worked with their young soldiers, Nelledir and Orthon had everything in check on the fields and when Saida was back from the court, she took care of her own regiment. Later on, Oropher assigned   Faron's ranks to her – by doing this, he had everything back under control. All his soldiers did exceptional job and when Taranir would be back in his time, it will be even better.
'Tell me, have you helped them a lot with their work?' Oropher asked when he slowly strolled through the field with Alagos. They took on themselves doing the morning round and they often did it to meet with soldiers on fields and hear what other problems they had that didn't fit official request.
'Only a bit and mostly with ending reports, so there will be no problems later to catalog them.' Alagos answered as he looked around. They chose the way close to the stables and quite many young foals were now enjoying the paddocks around.
'I will give them some more time to gather experience, but they are getting closer in promoting them to officers.' Oropher said. 'I will assign them to help Saida with Faron's regiments. They will participate in every shift, briefing and training they will be ordered to do.'
'A fine idea. And Saida will teach them well. Beside Taranir, she is the best tutor out of our team.' Alagos said. 'And how is their progress? Are you still taking them for training?'
'I do and I have to say they are getting better and better, day by day.' he smiled a bit. 'Remembering them from before, no one would ever said that those are the same soldiers.'
'They used to say this about us, so don't get so nostalgic.' Alagos huffed a bit. 'We will have to find time and take them to the forest, so each of them could lead their own small team. Or ride three times with only one of them.'
Oropher knew they already should have done that long ago. Since Halloth and Amrun didn't have problems with their horses anymore, they should leave the city as soon as they could. It would have been the best for his young soldier to ride with their own division, but Oropher, as a General, and his soldiers, as high ranking officers, were ever busy and it was hard for them to leave the fields at the same time. Not counting sudden situations, when they were leaving the city to track and fight the enemy, there was almost no time for them to get a ride together as a team.
'You are right, we should do such a thing.' Oropher said and then he sighted delicately. 'But you see yourself how busy we are lately. Without Faron, we had to reschedule all our duties.' he continued after a short pause. 'I will talk with Mablung about this, maybe there will be possibility for us to do such a thing. It's peaceful enough now and our ranks are taken care of. Maybe he will agree.'
'I have been wondering sometimes.' Alagos said and he lowered his voice a bit. 'Why was it Mablung and not Egnaspen who became a Primus General? And there is Haerdin as well. All of them are close in age and they all have great experience.'
Oropher wondered for a moment about this. He had thoughts about this as well, but long ago he stopped digging through this. When he was a foot soldier, it didn't matter to him who was his commander and as a General he worked well with Egnaspen and Haerdin as fellow Generals and with Mablung as their commander.
'Well, I don't know what lead the King in his choice.' he finally said. 'As you know, there is not much known about Egnaspen at all, so it's hard to even say anything. But Mablung belongs to the House of Warriors, the greatest and best well known. His father, Egnass, was probably the greatest warrior in Doriath, most respected by fellow soldiers, but also by nobles and common people alike. And he respected everyone in turn. He was said to be truly of peaceful mind and known for his kind gestures despite his stregth and ferocity he showed as a warrior.' Oropher nodded at his own words. He remembered he spoke about it with Galadhon once. 'He was a Queen's chosen. Queen's Warrior, that's how they used to call him. It was Melian who graced Egnass with her nightingale and it remained as a symbol of his House and it was inherited by all his sons.'
'He died before Menegroth was build, didn't he?' Alagos said and sighted a bit, shaking his head. 'A shame to loose such a soldier. Though, there are still stories about his valiant fight.'
'He was buried close to Esgalduin, but by now, river took this ground for its own.' Oropher said. 'His spirit probably took his way to the West, but they say that Egnass keeps his watch over Doriath through waters of Esgalduin.'
'That's a nice legend.' Alagos smiled heartily. 'Wonder what Mablung thinks about it.'
'I guess it's nice to believe in something. Unless it doesn't hurt others.' Oropher said. 'But then, there is Haerdin. Many often forget how accomplished warrior he is.'
'True. Even I catch myself with that sometimes.'
'I don't know much about it, but there is something about his past. There are only scraps of stories here and there.' Oropher continued his thoughts. 'But all are in agreement that its full of sorrow, though no one knows why.'
'Maybe it's better to not dig into this.' Alagos aswered nodding at those words with full conviction. 'Some matters are better left as they are.'
Oropher couldn't agree more on this. It's better to not push through things one is not ready for. Later, upon discovering what was hidden, there is only deep regret. Oropher felt it on his own skin.
For a bit they walked in silence, only glancing around, passing by soldiers who were either training, working their armor or weapons, taking care of the horses. They were unperturbed and neither they bothered anyone on purpose. Though soldiers greeted them and they answered, it was not requested to salute before them. Doing their work was requested of their soldiers which a salute would only interrupt.
They took the road closer to the stables and they were barely close to it when Alagos glanced at him at the tip of his eye and smiled delicately. But this smiled was meaningful.
'Oh, and who is there trying to hide so badly how he is staring at you?' Alagos said then, pretending he was wondering. 'A nice looking fellow, yes indeed. If I was not with Lalveth than maybe...and he is a blacksmith, no wonder he has looks like this.'
He precisely knew about whom his friend spoke about and he couldn't help, but smile at the mention Alagos did.
'If he is a blacksmith and he is staring at me, then I know him. His name is Esgar and he is the one who takes care of our horses.' Oropher said and shrugged his arms when he noticed a bit of surprised glance of Alagos. 'I spoke with him many times when he was taking care of my horses, especially Bargamo. And I enjoy talking with him. And he seems to like me as well.'
'Seeing his sidelong glances, I would say that is understatement.' Alagos said as he looked back at the elf. 'He is coming this way. Wonder what he wants?' he looked back at Oropher with mellow smile. 'Want me to leave you alone with him?'
Oropher send Alagos a silencing glare and then turned to the blacksmith who just approached them. Esgar had really dark hair, almost raven black, also those were very long and he always wore his hair gathered in a ponytail. But it was never well arranged and many strands escaped the ponytail getting into his face and sticking everywhere. As for Oropher, it had some charm.
But Esgar's eyes were a strange mix of hazel and brown in colour. He was as tall as Oropher and very well build, mostly thanks to his profession, since he was working all day at the forge and then with the horses, he had well developed muscles. Speaking of which, Esgar was a true master of his profession – he had a hand for horses and never had problems with handling them, neither he had any problems with fixing any inacuracies of their hooves and pieces of steel he made were unbelievably durable.
'Oropher! I was wondering if I will meet you today.' Esgar said with his typical smile and then he nodded graciously at Alagos, greeting him. 'Well met, officer!'
'Indeed, well met.' Alagos smiled back and Oropher prevented a sight that immediately formed.
'We took on ourselves to do the morning round.' he said, glancing a bit behind him. 'And I see you have your hands full.'
'It's high time we take care of the young horses. Stable masters said to come to them as soon as we can. And young smiths of our craft will have a possibility to gain more experience.' Esgar said, then he looked at Oropher curiously. 'I heard that your retired horse, Kairon, is more or less back in shape. But his carers are saying that he is still limping on his leg.' he continued. 'I've made a horseshoe that may fix this problem and make Kairon even better. Can I take him later?'
'Of course you can. You know you don't have to ask me.' Oropher said. He spoke with stable masters few times and asked about Kairon. They said the same thing as Esgar now, that the horse still has problems with its leg. Sometimes the steed seem to be better and then it get even worse. 'I won't get in your work. You know a lot more about smithing than I do.'
'But still, it's your horse, so I had to ask.' Esgar smiled once more. 'Well then, I will get to my work and leave you to your own. It's a lot of it for all of us. Later, we will move to the stables near the Palace. I never liked it there very much. Here on the fields it feels more like home.' he sighted delicately and said his goodbyes. 'Have a good day then.'
'You too, Esgar. I hope the nobles at the Palace won't get in your way too much.' Oropher said and with last looks on each other they walked separate ways – Esgar back to the stable and Oropher with Alagos deeper in the fields.
'You really like him.' Alagos said after they walked a bit away and Oropher nodded.
'I do. As I said, I enjoy talking with him.' he said and shrugged his arms, but Alagos shook his head a bit.
'No, I mean...You really like him.'
Oropher took a breath with a hiss. Of course Alagos would notice, his friend knew him so well and moreover it was a thing Oropher couldn't deny. And, truth be told, it was a thing he didn't want to hide as well.
'Yes, I do like him.' he said a bit lost in own thoughts. 'I can easily say there would be something more between us if we cared for it.'
'Then why not? You both want it, why not even try?' Alagos said, but Oropher shook his head.
'No, Alagos. It is only a wish that there would ever be something between us.' Oropher said with a sight. 'You once said that I can marry anyone since I am a Prince. I can't do that, not now and not ever.' he continued after a short pause. 'With Esgar...our status differ too much to make this work. Esgar knows this. As do I.' he paused for a moment, but then added at the end. 'Us being together is like writing a fairytale. Only there such things can happen.'
'So pessimistic.' Alagos huffed at him. 'I managed to be together with Lalveth, against her family, agaist the nobles and the court. Against everything.'
'I am not pessimistic. I am just realistic and I am telling the truth.' Oropher said and then he smiled briefly to Alagos. 'And yes, you managed to be with Lalveth. But Lord Raevon will never look upon you with pleasant eye, neither will her borthers. Houses that support House Brasson are surely against your union as well.' he sighted. 'The truth is, neither me or any of my cousins can marry who we want, unless we truly love someone with similar social status that we posess.'
'Is it all so strict? For real?' Alagos snorted and shook his head at what Oropher could find no other answer but a sight.
'I belong to House Elmo. You have to remember it. Beside House Elwe, we are the highest authority in Doriath.' he said. 'We have many privileges and only more restrictions.'
'I know, I know. You have to satisfy everyone, common people and nobles alike. And nobles are demanding. Actually, common people as well.' Alagos said as if irritated all of sudden, probably remembering problems he had to face with Lalveth – problems that were not yet over. 'Sometimes I really forget you are a Prince.'
'Come now, it was one of the reasons you got so interested in me before.' Oropher said with a bit of a smile as he remembered their early duty with Alagos and how persistant his friend was to get closer to him. Which at first irritated Oropher horribly.
'I loved all of you at once.' Alagos said as he winked at Oropher. 'Else it wouldn't have mattered if you were a Prince or not.'
'Alright, we should stop here. You start talking as if you were drunk.' Oropher said, but neither him or Alagos managed to say something more when breathless elf got to them and Oropher immediately recognised outfit of an assistant that worked in the infirmary.
'General, Elhador send me for you!' the elf said immediately. 'Your soldier! He woke up!'
First surprise was quickly lost to mix of relief and joy. He turned to Alagos only to see in him just the same emotions and before he said somehing, Alagos already spoke.
'I will get others, you go to Faron.' he said and without waiting for agreement he turned around and walked the way towards fielded paddock.
Oropher turned back to assistant and nodded at him, in less then a moment he was following the elf towards the infirmary.
Upon entering, he noticed that there was only Elhador beside Faron, there was not even Tirnel around. Surely, another assistant was already on his way to her, but it will be a moment before she will get here.
He walked deeper into the infirmary and Elhador turned to him, hearing steps. By the healer's face, Oropher knew there was nothing to worry about Faron's health and everything was going as it should. And Faron himself was still a bit pale and it was not easy to guess that he woke up from his rest truly not long ago.
'Does being in your team automatically means to be a target?'
Oropher smiled and approached Faron closer, patting Elhador's arm as he passed by the healer.
'I told you from the beginning it won't be easy.' he said and sat on the chair near the bed facing Faron, but he didn't pursue this matter further, instead he changed the subject.
'Elhador told me what happened...and the consequences of it.' he said briefly moving his left hand, but he let go of it when a apinful scamp send grimace on his face. 'I feel the difference, my hand and its grip is much weaker.'
'Give yourself time.' Oropher said, though a lone thought about loosing a soldier such as Faron was terrible enough. Not even concidering that Faron may loose ability to shoot a bow, something he was born to do and something he loved. 'Elhador will help you and later on you will train on your own.'
Faron laughed a bit, waving away his concerns.
'Don't doubt that. And worry not, it's not the first time I got wounded in this particular hand.' he said and he smiled a bit, probably to his memories. 'I ripped my wrist, broke elbow, damaged shoulder, even a spear pierced my arm. Everytime I healed from this and got to work.'
'Tell me again, how you survived your time in Ossiriand?' Oropher said and Faron looked at him amused.
'Green Elves have it in their blood.' he just said and Oropher shook his head.
Sometimes he forgot that Faron was the oldest elf in their team. He remembered early times of the March and recalled both Denethor and Lenwe with such familiarity and fondness that it was clear he knew them well. Faron was already there before Oropher and any of his soldiers were even born.
Then Faron became a bit more serious and he looked at Oropher considering.
'It's good you are here before others. I need to tell you what happened during attack.'
Oropher focused from his own thoughts and listened intently to what his friend would say. When he glanced around to see if they were truly alone, he nodded and Faron continued.
'The marchwarden...he said something weird, that made no sense to me.' he said. 'His eyes were were unhealthy, full of sorrow, but also hatred. I have never see it in anyone before.' he paused for a moment. 'He said that his son may be lost to him, but we won't manage to keep him away from his wife and daugher.'
Oropher became grim. Then it was even worse than Oropher thought. Somehow, in his twisted beliefs, Eregon disowned Taranir and no longer thought about him as his son. It could be said Eregon did that when he wanted to hurt Taranir, but actions and words hurt differently.
'Maybe those words mean something to you.' Faron said and Oropher nodded sighting delicately.
'They do, but...it's complicated and hard situation.'
'It's alright, you don't have to explain it. I just hope this elf won't hurt anyone again.'
'He won't.' Oropher said with full confidence. 'He is held in a custody where he awaits his judgment.'
'We all make mistakes.' Faron said. 'I don't want him to be exiled. You know he will probably die out there.'
'This is the only right judgment.' Oropher answered fully aware what fate awaited Eregon. 'Some things are not to be forgiven.'
'No, Oropher. We have to forgive each other. Otherwise you will only poison yourself.'
Oropher frowned at those words. He won't ever bring himself to forgive what Eregon did to Taranir and his family. Neither he will forgive what happened to Faron. Eregon will be disdained for what he did and it won't ever be forgotten.
Before he managed to answer anyhow, infirmary became crowded as the rest of his soldiers walked in and all his grim humor was lost in their friendliness. He realised it was one of the few times for a long time when they managed to gather all together. At least most of them, as Taranir was gone. Oropher at once wondered how Taranir was doing, though he suspected that beyond at he felt at peace that his family was finally safe from the threat that hunged upon them for so long.
Oropher took a while to look at his soldiers one after another. His youngest ones were as always on merry moods, every now and then talking up with somebody. At least Amrun and Halloth, while Tinnu preferred to rather listen to what others were saying. Saida briefly said that the horses Faron took care of were well enough and that she was leading now his regiments. All in all every one of them were clearly in better moods than a sunrise ago.
Soon enough Tirnel came to visit her husband and all of them took their leave from the infirmary to give them privacy. Oropher could only imagine how hard this situation was for Tirnel, but also for her children, though when he asked Tirnel about this, she said they were well enough with this. Of course they were worried sick and grief marred their faces, but reassurance that their father will be alright in the future was enough to give them peace they needed.
Before Oropher let his soldiers go, they did a quick briefing, but there was nothing of true importance to say, most of them were overseeing trainings of their ranks, while Saida was taking Halloth, Amrun and Tinnu to help her with the schedule for Faron's regiments and dispose necessary orders. The rest of their day should be peaceful and with this in mind they went their own ways to do their duties and Oropher himself went to his office to take care of some more papers.
Only in the early evening, he decided to let go of working in his office and he made his way out of the building to scretch out his sore muscles.
He slowly went through the fields that, he had to admit, were quite empty even for this time of day. He remembered what Esgar said before and he directed his steps towards the stable to check how his retired horse was doing with its new shoe.
But hearing characteristical sounds of steel equipment, he quickly learned that Esgar was not done yet with his work. When Oropher peered into the stable he saw the blacksmith still on with his work, though it could be said it was almost the end of it – just a simple corrections of hoof were needed around the shoe.
'Kairon is very patient, isn't he?' he said when he got closer and Esgar looked up at him from his work.
'One of the most well-tempered I have seen.' he said looking back on the hoof and getting rid of inaccuracies. 'We will see how he is doing through the night and I will come to him in the morning. If something will be wrong I will take the shoe off immediately.'
'Let's hope he will be well.' Oropher said briefly patting Kairon's back and the horse immediately took interest in him and demanded more caresses as if Oropher had to compensate for what Esgar was doing.
'And I'm done!' Esgar announced straightening up and scretching his back. 'I will never get used to bending so much over hooves and I'm doing it for centuries!' he glanced at Oropher and smiled. 'There was so much to do it the stable near the court. We will have to go back there tomorrow!' he said as he shook his head. 'But then, the King's mare is close to birth. Everyone is wondering about her foal.'
'After such parents, the foal will be a truly gracious animal.' Oropher said while Esgar started to gather his equipment. He gathered large pliers that were used to grab a hot steel and he gave them to the smith. And when Esgar took the pliers from him their fixed together and it almost felt as if they were looking at each other with longing.
Oropher looked away, going back to petting Kairon, but he felt Esgar's eyes were still on him. He should walk away, they both should walk their own seperate ways.
'Do you think that we-?' Esgar said, but he paused as if he didn't know how to finish. Instead he reached out Oropher felt his hand grabbing his own.
'Esgar.' he started, turning back to the smith. 'Don't get me wrong. I like you as I would like my partner. But I don't want to give you false hope since we both know we won't be able to be together.'
'I don't expect it. I expect nothing from you. I know what I am on for and I can cope with it.' Esgar said, his hair as ever were disheveled and strand sticked to his face. 'But at least we can...feel the foretaste of what could be between us.'
Oropher smiled delicately and took a bit of hair from Esgar's face. His cheerful nature and joyful character already stated that there would be no peace in their lives – Esgar was always up to something, but his happy mood was contagious and Oropher felt good in his presence. It was so different from his sturdy soldiers - peaceful Taranir, frivolous Alagos, and it was a nice change. It was something he wanted to have around.
'We shouldn't do it Esgar. It's not wise.' Oropher said, considering all his thoughts and yet, his heart told different story. 'But I still want it.'
'So do I.' Esgar said with his usual smile and before Oropher knew he held Egar's face in hands kissing him, brushing fingers over his skin to feel him even better and Esgar in turn held him by neck, getting fingers through his silvery-grey hair.
It was one of those craving that were not wise, yet Oropher wanted them more than anything. He always minded himself to not have such closeness with Alagos on the fields or in his office, yet right now here he was, staying almost in the middle of the stable kissing Esgar. What saved them from being utterly visible was the fact that Kairon lifted his huge head and covered them up.
When they pulled away and stared at each other, Oropher noticed how Esgar's eyes were gleaming lightly, but his dark hair were still well visible even in shadowy stable.
'Come with me.' Oropher said gripping Esgar's hand tighter. 'Leave all of this here and let's go.'
He didn't have to wait long for an answer. Esgar put his equipment briefly near the wall and Oropher lead the horse back to its stall. When they got away from the fields together, Oropher knew even then that it would be for him one of those nights worth remembering.
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disaster-musician · 6 years ago
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My dudes:
I’m really sorry I’ve been inactive for so long— lots of things have been happening these last few months and I’m currently really busy.
But!! I promise I haven’t forgotten all the messages and asks you guys have sent. I’m going to try and aswer them one by one.
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morgueghost · 6 years ago
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Will you be responding to the asks from yesterday?
if you mean the tarot requests then i’m going to try to!! i got a few while i was open that i didn’t connect with and a few after that i did, so i want to do the ones that were on time first because that’d b rlly rude to do the others and not the ones that were actually on time.. but i’ve been feeling super drained today & tomorrow’s the full moon eclipse so i’m gonna be doing my ritual stuff, and then a busy weekend so it won’t be until next week, hopefully tuesday! i’m super sorry to keep you guys waiting, but this kind of just reaffirms to me that i need to stick to my one hour limit bc every time i go over it i lose the energy needed to do the readings
tl;dr i’m going to try my best bc i got a few very important questions that i feel called to aswer, but it probably won’t be until next week, hopefully earlier in the week than later!!
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knb-imagines-blog · 7 years ago
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GOM + Kagami being there for You
This is something I really need and I hope you will like it.
Kuroko Tetsuya
‘‘I’m sure she didn’t mean it.’’ He stated in a serious voice, gently massaging your back with his left hand.
‘‘Oh she did, she meant it. She had spat these words with such venom that I almost died there.’’ You sobbed into his arm, getting more hysterical as the seconds passed by. ‘‘We don’t even see each other that much. What can’t she be a little nicer?’‘
‘‘S/o-’‘ Kuroko called your name and your head immediately perked to look at him in the eyes.’‘-your mother has been alone for a very long time, she doesn’t know how to deal with her almost adult daughter. I’m not trying to excuse her behaviour, because what she did was plainly wrong, I’m just trying to show you that her words don’t describe who you are at all. It’s just some nonsense she says to make herself feel better.’‘ He stroked your head affectionately at which your heart melted, leaving behind the heaviness you carried after meeting your mum earlier that day. ‘‘It’s not good, but you can’t change it. There’s no need to cry over it, when you have so many people thinking you are amazing. Including me, of course.’’ Your boyfriend pecked your lips and your foreheads touched, staying still.
‘‘Wow Tetsu, I wasn’t aware you could talk so much.’‘ You laughed, earning unamused glare from him and a light punch in the gut.
‘‘You are an ungrateful brat sometimes, I swear.’‘
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Kagami Taiga
‘‘Taiga, the light of my life, you don’t have to stay here with me and rot, you know?’‘
‘‘Please, you would die without me here.’‘ And with that he put the thermometer in your mouth, making you unable to speak, however, when he finally took it out, you started arguing once again.
‘’I’m really okay, you didn’t have to leave practice for me. It’s very unprofessional.’’ He raised an eyebrow at you, not taking your stupid excuses for a reason to just get up and go home. You both stared at each other for what felt like a minute, before you eventually gave up. ‘’And I feel like I’m using you, okay - you got me.’’ You rolled your eyes and rolled onto your other side to avoid his shocked expression. It’s not like you didn’t want him to be here, it’s just that he could do so many funnier things right now, which didn’t contain cleaning someone’s house and jumping around a person who can barely lift a finger.
‘’You are sick - me taking care of you has nothing to do with using anybody. I’m doing what I want and this is what I want. Now face me, because it’s time for your pills.’’ You groaned loudly at his statement and he laughed upon seeing your pouting face. ‘’See? It wasn’t so hard.’’ He praised after you swallowed the medicine and chuckled once again when you shot him a very nasty glare. ‘’Now I’m going to make some dinner and we can watch a movie or something.’’
Your redhead boyfriend got up and started walking towards the kitchen, when you tiredly moved to catch his sleeve in your fingers. He turned to you quickly, asking if something was wrong and you just shook your head.
‘‘Everything is fine, it’s just --- thank you Taiga, seriously.’‘ You didn’t dare to watch his reaction, but somewhere deep inside you knew, he was very happy right then.
‘‘You are welcome, s/o.’‘
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Aomine Daiki
‘‘Okay, what the fuck did he do again?’‘ 
‘‘Nothing really.’’ You replied, wiping already cold tears with the sleeve of your blouse from your cheeks. ‘‘It was my fault, anyway.’‘
‘‘Your fault?’‘ He questioned angrily, swallowing all the frustration he had in him. He didn’t want you to experience someone’s anger once again. ‘‘Him being a jealous prick for no reason is your fault? Don’t make me laugh.’‘ You flinched at his harsh words, and he immediately regretted uttering them. So much for making you feel better.
‘‘I shouldn’t have met up with your team behind his back - I just really wanted to see you! But you know how he is.’‘ You cried once more, cringing at how pathetic you must have looked right now. 
‘‘Yeah, I know that he goes around flirting with everything that moves and you can’t even hang out with your friends. That’s ridiculous.’‘ His brain started creating very vivid images of him killing your boyfriend in many interesting ways, but then the realisation of the meaning of his words hit him. You weren’t aware of his disloyalty towards you and he didn’t mean to just scream this information at you. His eyes went back to yours and he noticed how they shined with fresh tears in them. He wanted to call it a very beautiful sight, but it wasn’t the time nor the place for it. ‘‘Shit, I’m sorry - I didn’t mea--’’
‘‘It’s okay Daiki, I suspected something, I just needed a valid proof. Although, I have been thinking about breaking up with him anyway, he was slowly getting violent and it’s not something I want to be around any longer.’‘ Your body was trembling a little, but the real war was happening inside Aomine’s mind, who, upon hearing that some low life wanted to harm you, was ready to slaughter the guy’s entire family just to make you safe. ‘‘Thank you, I realyy appreciate your support.’‘
‘‘Everything for you, s/o.’‘ It really wasn’t a good time for his confession, but once you healed, he would make you the happiest person in the world.
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Kise Ryouta
‘‘S/o-chi, you look very out of character, did something happen?’‘ His question didn’t particularly surprised you, because you seriously looked different than usual. That day was relatively hot, enough to wear some shorts along with a short-sleeved shirt, but you against your normal outfit decided to wear a hoodie with trousers. Even your mood was worse than ever, your grumpy face only confirmed it.
Kise was extremely worried about you and was scared that someone may have done bad things to you. He was intensively staring at your blank face, awaiting an answer that took too long to form in your mind and you were just observing him with saddened eyes. ‘’Will you tell me s/o-cchi?’’
You sighed, suddenly wearing an expression of discomfort, which twisted into embarrassement very quickly. ‘’Ryouta, do I look fat to you?’’ This question came out as a whisper, but he heard it almost too correctly. Millions of imagines started haunting his memory, especially the ones with him constantly worrying about his weight as a model and an athlete.
‘‘No, s/o-cchi. Did someone tell you that?’‘ He asked, concerned and ready to fight.
‘‘Not exactly.’’ You stopped your words from flowing out of your mouth to take a deep, relaxing breath. ‘‘I just overheard some of my classmates conversation and, you know, they weren’t saying nice things about me. That’s it. Not a big deal.’‘ You dismissed your problem, obviously trying to drop the topic, but Kise was having none of it.
‘‘It is a big deal, because their words affect you and they shouldn’t. Look at me, I’m a model and people still mock me behind my back and say really disgusting things. The society will never be happy and it’s their loss. You don’t need to live like them and waste your life on hatred. Be happy, show  them who is the boss.’‘ Both of his hands were on your shoulders as you looked at yourselves. He was clearly determined and you just speechless. And then in the simple blink of the eye you burst into tears, asking him to go home with you so you could change into something more comfortable.
‘‘Sure, lovely. Maybe we could hit a beach on the weekend, what do you think?’‘
‘‘Gladly.’‘ You aswered with no hint of saddnes on your flushed face.
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Midorima Shintarou
Midorima wasn’t subtle, but easy-going. If he didn’t think his head would explode, he would ask you what’s wrong a long time ago. However, your moping was getting slightly worse with each day and it made him think that the situation was more serious than he previously predicted. He tried to talk to you about it for hours, but once he bit his tongue, the second time he almost walked into the wall and basically - he was scared for his life. But he also loved you dearly, so there was no going back this time. He would do it, he really would.
‘‘What’s wrong with you? You looked like somebody had died, nanodayo.’‘ At least he asked, okay? No one was talking about being nice and shit.
‘‘Nice as always Shin.’‘ You laughed, without a humour and came back to doing your math homework.
‘‘I didn’t mean it like that. I just---worry.’‘ The last part was uttered so quickly and quietly as if he didn’t want you to hear it at all, but you did and it shocked you.
‘’Mn --- it’s nothing, really. I think I’m just being paranoid and all.’’ You smiled tiredly, putting your pen down and he turned his face to you, to listen to your confession even better. ‘‘My parents are behaving kinda weird, something’s going on and all I’ve been thinking about it is them getting divorced. I know it’s not my choice, but theirs, however, it makes me anxious. Sorry, if it’s annoying.’‘ He focused on your words, processing them and trying to create a perfect response, which would be honest, but also helpful.
‘‘I know it may be scary now, but I swear that even it they separate their ways, they would still love you the same.’‘ He grasped your fingers lightly in his, face going red. ‘‘As I do, nanodayo.’‘
You looked up at his words, blushing almost as much as him. ‘’I love you, too Shin. Thank you.’’
‘‘It’s nothing, nanodayo.’‘ He replied and pushed his glasses a liittle higher on his nose. His hand never leaving yours.
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Akashi Seijurou
‘‘Ugh, I’m so frustrated Seijurou, I don’t think I can keep this up.’‘ You said at the verge of the tears, pushing math book away from your body. Akashi looked blankly at you, not knowinng how to motivate you to stay focused for a little more time.
‘‘Let’s try again, I will explain better, alright?’‘ He caressed your cheek, desperately trying to stop you from crying. It was the last thing he wanted to see you doing. Even though, he didn’t show it that much he really wanted you to be content. He was clever and on top of the class, but he could admit that math could be really hard. He knew that it was your worst subject and seeing you try so much and then failing was heartbreaking. So he decided to fight with you, teaching you every chance he got. You praised him for it all the time, despite his scary appearance he was really patient with you. You couldn’t help, but love him more for it.
‘‘Okay, okay, but it’s so terrible. I feel like the worst person on the Earth! How did I even get to Rakuzan? I’m the dumbest person I know!’‘ You cried, your words slightly muffled by your palm. Akashi couldn’t see your eyes, but he knew they were probably red with a dark bags under them. You were really hard-working, hee admired it in you.
‘‘You are not dumb, you just need a little practice, love. Nobody was born a genius.’‘ 
‘‘You were.’‘
‘‘I was not, I was just pushed into being the best. I’m glad that you weren’t.’‘ He stated, giving you the most lovestruck look he could pull out, just because you couldn’t see it. It may sound stupid, but he was scared you would find out how important you were to him. How you mattered.
‘‘I’m sorry Sei, I didn’t mean to bring up bad memories.’‘ You replied guiltily, throwing your arms over his neck in an attempt to hug him. It came out a little messy, but he appreciated it anyway.
‘‘I’m not angry, but you can still repay me by not giving up, okay?’‘ You sniffed, but didn’t dare to protest and opened a book once again. ‘’If you promise me that you will work hard I can give you a very pleasurable reward later, huh?’’ He whispered huskily in your ear, making you red all over your face as you nodded like a crazy.
Maybe he could motivate you.
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Murasakibara Atsushi
‘‘Why are you crying, s/o-chin?’‘
‘‘Oh Atsushi, I didn’t hear you coming.’‘ You replied, smilling through your tears. Trying to hide the fact that you were obviously upset.
‘‘Why are you crying?’‘ He asked as if he didn’t hear your previous statement, not liking being ignored.
‘‘No reason, seriously.’‘ You asnwered this time, but it only left his unsatisfied, wanting to know more.
‘‘That’s a lie, s/o-chin. Talk to me.’‘ He whined like a child and sat next to you on the floor, in front of the window, which showed you empty streets and a clear, blue sky, which perfectly imitated how you were feeling. Empty.
‘‘Sometimes people are sad, just like that, there’s no real reason, but it doesn’t mean that it’s not important. I just feel a little down today, you can leave if you want. I don’t want to burden you.’‘ You knew your boyfriend very well. He was bright and could be very clever when he wanted to, but there were things he just wasn’t aware of and simply didn’t care.
‘‘You don’t burden me. I want to stay and make you feel better somehow.’‘ Murasakibara replied, his body a little closer to yours, so you could smell his candy scent, which was more comforting that you could ever imagine.
‘‘It’s not that easy, Atsu.’‘ Your sudden and quiet laugh, sounded more depressing than you wanted it to, but it was just so hard to be happy, when everything just felt so wrong.
‘‘Okay, but let me stay, alright? We can just be here for each other, do nothing and cuddle.’‘ He stated and immediately enveloped you in his long arms after seeing you nod to his proposition. ‘‘I will stay here until you are happy again - and if you never are, I will still be here.’‘ He kissed the skin of your neck, squeezing you tightly in his embrace, shielding you from the world. And in that exact moment you knew that eventually, everything will be just fine.
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tysonrunningfox · 8 years ago
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New year, new start
Dear Writter.
I don t know if you remember me, I am Ferro, the guy ho wrote that letter a few months ago about not coming back to this tumblr (yeah I know the irony).
If anyone wants to read the rest of it, it’s here, because I don’t even know, it’s nothing I haven’t seen before and that means it’s nothing the rest of you have seen before.  
I...Ferro, I guess, because I recently got called out for Dude which used to be my gender neutral, friendly but detached name, I...I don’t think I can make it more clear than I did before.  I don’t want to discuss httyd with you, honestly, I’m not into ‘discussing’ it at all.  I don’t know why you’re so focused on me in particular, as I explained before we disagree on many important things and there are literally hundreds of people who agree with you.  Go talk to one of them, I get to say no.  
And I’m really sorry to the rest of you, especially everyone who has sent me lovely submissions over the years, I think I have to close my submission box.  I’m just so done with this.  Like...it just doesn’t stop.  If it moves to my ask box I might have to turn off anons, which I’ve never done, and I really don’t want to because 90% of my anons are lovely and I don’t want to lose that I just...
This is never going to stop on its own, and it really sucks for me, and I have to stop it.  
And it’s not that this letter in particular is rude, it’s just...it’s the fact that I said no and this didn’t stop.  It’s the fact that I’ve said repeatedly that I don’t want to do this and people still keep trying to make me.  It’s that they still want to fight about the same damn thing I said I was done with months ago. 
The reason that I have to writte this letter is that well, a few days before New Year I came here and see the aswer of the letter I wrote and It make me think. So this letter is for you and the fans that read the letter I send you:
Look, I am sorry for been rude with the messages, really I am, somtimes I put too much energy in them and make them too long or I put the wrong word (sorry for that, I am spanish guy so somtimes I don t know when I use a bad term o wrote wrong somthing), and like all I learn from my mistakes and tried to change that.
But also have to say that I have the feeling that I have been acused of things that I am not, like when they say I was a misogynist just beacouse there are things about Astrid that I do not like.In any moment my intention was to change your mind, in fact I don t rembember writting things like that, If you have feel that way I am really sorry, that was never my intetion. But I also have to say that the comments of other people of the things I think of HTTYD were rude too, or at least I feel that way.
Of course you have the right to no answering to people, and bealive me when I say  that i know when other people makes really means things about your work. But I never say anything bad about your work, in fact i will never have writte this or any of the others thing If I have and interest in your work, in fact, as Cheff I am, I really like your work with Cast Iron . 
I am with you  against that ones that only insult your work, and of others authors, just beacouse is they don t like the argument that fuck up his dream world.But In my case, and of other readers,we like to share ideas and read new stories and we really like to ask the author, just beacouse we are courius about their stories and sometimes  that people that act like jerks affect baddly to the others.
So the main reason of this letter is to say that I am sorry if I was rude, sorry if you feel that I was mean to you and I hope we can start from zero, I will really like to discuss abot HTTYD and the charachters with you and other people, only if you want, if you don t want i will respect your desicion, but at leats we leave in good terms. And to proove that I want to treat this like and adult, if you want and like to share opinios and talk about your stories, when you like to do it, I will give you  my principal e-mail direcction and my real name. Uderstand this is a big step for me, since child I have computers and I am really caerful about using my principal e-mail dirction and my real name if there are not for things like family, friends or work. I will do this with the hope that you don t speak with a person that Is hidding behind a nickname or thinks like that.
Well, for final I want to wish you, and all the other people  that read this, Happy new year and that I hope you start very well this year.
Sincerely.
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cassperthegreat-blog · 7 years ago
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I figured what if maybe i could ask you questions and you wouldnt lie.. Like, at all. You wouldnt hide your feelings and wouldnt pretend you were ok or some kind of macho man. What if I asked you a question and you told me the truth. We could sit on the sand when we finally have that vacation with out friends we used to talk about. I would be awake because I wanted to stretch the time I spent awake on our vacation, You'd be awake cause you were playing games on your phone and when you got up for a drink or some food you saw me on the sand. We hadn't talked in so long but you figured It wasnt a time to hesitate about things, to think if it'll be awkward or stuff so you just did. You sat on the sand a few seats away from me without a word while you drank your water and I stared at the ocean. We'll sit there in silence for a few minutes before one of us talks.
It's me. I break the silence.
With no pretense I said "I hope we get back to how we used to joke around before. I really wish I do. I think we can, sometime soon maybe"
I dont know what you would say.. Cause all of this is just in my head. I'd like to think I know what you'll answer but honestly I really dont. I never really could tell when it came to you. But lets try to pretend you said something back .. Something I could reply to , something that will keep the conversation going. Maybe something funny... 'cause you are a funny guy. One of the reasons we actually clicked, you liked joking and I liked laughing.
We'll talk about how the trip is fun , and how we finally got it to happen , how this is more fun than we expected. We'll talk about everything that connects us... except for Us.
Maybe , maybe silence will fall between us and we'll start to talk about how we stopped talking. Or why we stopped talking. Maybe we'll finally start to aswer the questions I've been trying to avoid answering alone. We'll answer it together. To clarify what happened. To resolve all the things that bugged me from before. The things I said I should just stop thinking about. If you do that,if you answer those questions together with me you cant believe the peace it'll bring me. Its all I wanted.
I just wanted to know if You also wondered sometimes in the middle of the night if why we fell through. I just wanna know if you also sometimes suddenly stop what youre doing and just lay on your bed thinking of possible answers or what ifs. Maybe we'd also talk about how I sometimes came up with scenarios that will force us to talk. That maybe it'll be the reason we start talkibg again. Not where we left of but another start. I just wanna confirm if it I was just kidding myself when I used to think youre trying to listen-in on quiet conversations I have with our friends or that you stole a few glances my way whenever our group was together.
Did your friends also ask about me the way my bestfriends--the ones you never actually met but know, use to sometimes check-in on what happened to us and if we were casual again. Did you smile or laugh or shrug and made up an excuse that wont make them hate me , like I did? Just incase we happened again..Just so I wont have a bad name.
I just wanted to know if you also thought you probably could be a poet from all the thoughts of us and what we could have been. Do you have as many questions as I do?
Did you ever want something more than what we were?
I started this... piece not thinking of what It will be. Now I recognize it as a letter. A letter thats unsure if you'll ever be able to see or read for yourself. A what-were-we letter.
I swear if I had a pretty penmamship I would've written this down just for the sake of it.... but i dont so I'll just leave this here.. Like we left us there.
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